Mostly A Mommy

being grateful

2010-10-20T11:09:00.002-07:00

Today I am staying indoors caring for two sick kids. My daughter has been stuck to me like glue since 4:00 this morning, poor baby.
Having to see your children suffer is the hardest part of being a mother for me. Feeling so powerless, constantly watching and waiting, debating if a visit to the doctor would be helpful, or just a germ-infested waste of time(I find that many times I have brought my children to the doctor, they have caught something while there.)
That being said, today I feel a strange gratitude. I am grateful I have nowhere else I am supposed to be, no work I had to call in for or stress about to-do lists that are not getting done. My job is being done, even as I type this waiting for the ibuprofen to kick in and to feel my darling child to start to cool down. Yes, I am falling behind in chores and housework, but that part of my job is secondary to the health and well being of the small ones I have created.
Today I feel overwhelmed with the choices I have made in my life. I chose the absolute best life I could have chosen for myself. I chose to be a stay at home mother, and I am so grateful that I have the time to devote my every breath to taking the absolute best care of my sick children. I am so glad to have a husband who supports my decision and goes to work, I feel sorry for him today as he was up this morning with us, serving up ibuprofen and cool rags, and then had to go to work and worry about his kids all day. That is a huge sacrifice on his part, on any normal day, but it is moreso on my mind today that he is running on practically no sleep and lots of worry. (Don't worry, babe, "I got this!") He often makes the point to me that the role of working dads is harder than it looks, just like the stay at home mom role. And he is right, especially today. It is hard for him to leave his family behind every day and miss out on the fun stuff and enjoyable parts of their day. But on a day like today, I cannot imagine having to drag myself out of bed and tear myself away from my sick children. The feeling of dread would be overpowering as I tried to focus on the tasks at hand. Luckily, he knows he has me here to count on to care for them and keep him in the loop. And, as we all know, I am an amazing mother who takes the very best care of her kids. (wink, wink)

A Colorful World(warning, opinions)

2010-09-15T11:49:00.003-07:00

Our little family has been rocked a few times in recent months by discoveries of what is in the food we eat.

My husband has consumed protein powder for years. You may have seen on the news that several brands have been found to contain arsenic, cadmium, lead and mercury. Heavy metals with your workout, anyone? And this is perfectly legal, because there are very small amounts in each serving. The problem is that heavy metals build up in the body, and when you consume three servings of them a day, many of the brands tested exceeded safe levels. Needless to say, we were scared out of our wits.

I have been walking for a year with a very nice woman. I will not tell her story here, because that is her story, not mine. What I will say is that through the course of our conversations, I have discovered this website that has opened my eyes a bit. That website has an entire program for children with specific medical and behavioral problems, which I have so far been fortunate enough as not to have my children diagnosed with.

Basically, the point I am focusing on right now is that artificial colors are made from petroleum. Gross. Several cosmetic companies are steering clear of using petroleum-based products to apply to the skin. Kudos to them for that, but why is it still acceptable in our society to ingest things made from crude oil? When artificial colors originated, very few things consumed were colored. Now? Kids get candy nearly every day. Their toothpaste is colored. Their mouthwash dyes their teeth blue. They eat colored cereal and fruit snacks, and drink pink milk and drinks in every color of the rainbow. Salmon is not pink enough, mac-n-cheese is not yellow enough, and fruits are not colorful enough.
If a person were to look at the labels of everything their family consumed in one day, I wonder how much petroleum they would have taken in? A little at a time? And imagine if your child had a particular sensitivity to them, what do you think would happen then? And why do we have to have everything we put into our mouths super colorful?

It has always been a source of annoyance to me that the foods that are the least nutritious for my children are the most brightly colored and visually appealing, with characters they recognize on their packages.
I have always been a little concerned about colors, since years ago when I changed my son's diaper after he ate colorful cereal and found the contents to be an unnatural shade of green. But I have never known how much is hiding in children's favorite foods and where it came from. So I am making a change. I am making an effort to find food and drinks for my children that do not have artificial colors in them. And it isn't as hard as you might think. Some juice pouches are free of artificial colors and flavors, others are made from real juice. All I had to do is make sure to buy certain brands and my son still gets to have a juice pouch in his lunch. I found name brand fruit rolls that were made with "simply fruit." When I opened the package to give one to my kids, they smelled so good and fruity they made my mouth water. They aren't bright red and blue, but my kids did not complain a bit, just begged for more. Candy is a little more difficult, because almost all of it is very colorful, but I found chocolate, caramels and lollipops and several other new things to try. My son is old enough to understand that we are trying to stay away from colors, but he was really hoping that the eyeball-shaped Halloween gummies did not have any colors(double gross.) My daughter does not yet understand, so the trip to the store was a little bit more difficult than usual. However, I successfully steered her away from the pink milk, which is a noteworthy accomplishment.
I will let you know how things are going and if I notice any change in my children's behavior. I am not trying to follow the entire program at this time, just staying away from BHA, BHT, and artificial colors. Call me crazy if you want, but if there is a chance I am improving the health of my family, it is something I am going to do. I won't judge you or tell you what you should do with your kids, but I will do what I believe is best for my own(said with a charming smile!)

A sidenote: Why doesn't the government stop the food companies from putting all this nasty stuff into our food, you may ask? This brings up a topic I think best covered in a future post about politics, however, I believe that we hold the power. If we as a people stop buying things that are unhealthy, we remove the demand in the market for them. And if there is no demand, companies will stop making them and start supplying foods that we want. If we buy cookies made with real ingredients and juices made with real fruit, we will see more of them on the shelf. I believe we must educate ourselves and make good choices for ourselves, and the supply will follow demand.

What do you think? Are you willing to experiment with your family's diet with me? If so, we can share recipes and delight in new finds in the store that hit it big with the kids!

Singin' In the Rain

2010-08-22T08:49:00.008-07:00

My darling husband got up early yesterday and spent seven hours helping a dear friend move. He rushed home afterward to take a shower, for it was time for a "family date." When we take our kids somewhere fun, we always call it a date, and they think it is so special. Then when it is time for Mommy and Daddy's date, they know it is no big deal, they go on dates with us all the time. On the agenda this evening was a baseball game with Auntie and Uncle and cousins. As we stood in the extremely long line waiting to get into the game, the heavens opened and poured down buckets on us. Daddy ran to the car and retrieved a tiny umbrella from the car, but by the time he got back, we were soaked.

So what do you do when you have an umbrella and you are already soaking wet?

Why, dance in the puddles, of course!

Eventually the rain cleared and they started the game. Chiquita got to see her best friend Tuffy, and had a nice conversation with him:

And my son finally posed for a picture with him!!

The game only lasted an inning and a half before the rain hit again, but it was just long enough to see a home run and get some cotton candy and popcorn! The game was called, so we went to a restaurant to eat hot dogs and pretend they were from the ball park. They were really good and covered in chili, can't beat that! And my sweet husband bought some extra food and gave it to a hungry woman outside who had nothing to eat. What a guy! I am reminded of something my mom said to me once. She and my Grandma were having a conversation and concluded that my husband was going to heaven for sure. He is such a good guy, always the first one to jump to help out anyone in need, whether a stranger, acquaintance, or my grandma the time she rolled out of her chair at the 4th of July parade(she was fine!) He is so generous, kind and full of joy that you can't help but be drawn to him. I know I was!

Sad Neglect

2010-08-03T10:58:00.003-07:00

I must begin by apologizing for the sad lack of summer posts and pictures. Yikes. So, so I post old news and pictures one by one, or one giant too-lazy-to-do-more post? Yeah, you know me, all right! So one gigantic, I-just figured-out-how-to-upload-pictures-to-my-new-computer post(I-think-I-am-addicted to-this-key.)

The summer went by far too fast for my taste. So fast, in fact, that I don't know what happened to most of the pictures I took anyway. So the gigantic post I promised will probably be broken up into a couple disjointed pieces jumping around to document our adventures. Oh, well, the curse of having two computers, I suppose.

We made a special breakfast for Father's day, and my son has discovered french toast. Can you blame him? His mother is only an awesome cook! He learned how to dip it and flip it, two of the things that make French Toast great! Butter and powdered sugar topped it off, and he was hooked!

I do have a question for you, my faithful readers. Do you find that your daughters are more willing to help around the house than your sons? My daughter is always right next to me when it is time to do dishes, or cook. My son has to be called and instructed what to do. He is five and she is three, so is it their age that is the difference, gender or personalities? I had to talk to my son about how important it is to learn how to cook and clean up so that he can do it for himself when he grows up. But is this something carried in the Y chromosome? Are males born helpless and reliant on females? Is it innate for them to have a subservient female, mother and then later wife, to cook for them and clean up after them? Or do we as mothers condition our sons to expect to be served their whole lives? Am I fighting against nature to teach my son to fend for himself? Nah....

We also toured the Fire Station with some friends and had a fabulous time! A dear friend took some pictures of my kids and sent these adorable ones of my daughter to me: apparently, the pictures of my son jumping off of the pillars outside the station didn't turn out! hahaha!

Notice the Fireman badge...

How did I give birth to this? She is so beautiful I fear for her safety. Seriously.

Goals

2010-07-26T19:36:00.002-07:00

My sweet husband set a goal five years ago: to be a Building Official before the age of 30. He studied like a madman and took excruciating test after test for his many certifications along the way. Last year he became a Certified Building Official, and now gets to put those extra initials behind his name for work(and when he feels like it.) How I admire this man! He knows what he wants and pursues it feverishly until he obtains it. He will not be discouraged, nor does he get bored and lose focus(I wish I had that drive, I am so easily bored.) He has been waiting for the perfect opportunity to come along, and it has! He will cut his commute in half and go to work for his hometown! It is an opportunity that will bless all of our lives in many ways. And he accomplishes his goal with several months to spare before the big deadline. His ability to persevere to accomplish such a far-reaching goal, completely on his own motivation, amazes me. What a great man. We are so excited to see what the future holds!

Letters to my new pen pal

2010-06-01T08:20:00.005-07:00

I have a "pen pal" for the first time in twenty-plus years. And I am not happy about it. I used to have this pal live ten minutes' drive away. I could see her whenever I felt like it, which was all the time. This person has become a very important person in my life and I do not like putting distance of any kind on that relationship.

Now I am reduced to quick calls when both of us have a minute, which let's face it, is not often. So I have resorted to emailing her whenever I think of something interesting to say. Usually when emailing(or exchanging letters) I wait until receiving a reply before sending return correspondence. I figure that is probably why people lose touch with each other, one person gets busy and the other is left hanging indefinitely waiting for a response to all the probing questions they asked in their last letter(like how are you? and Did your kid's rash clear up?) So I have decided I will just post updates, crazy stalker pen-pal style, here for her to come and visit whenever she misses me(which I am sure is many times daily.)
Here are the first two emails, for posterity and continuity's sake:

Hey babe,
I just wanted to let you know I am thinking of you, always. Like everytime I use vinegar to clean, or hose off the back patio, or look at the bathroom walls. ;) Although I tried the trick we saw on "How Clean is your House?" cleaning the bathtub with baking soda and lemon. It helped only a little. So I tried vinegar on top of the baking soda/lemon and it fizzed a lot, but didn't do much better! Then I gave up and used Scubbing Bubbles, so at least it is triple clean, even if it still looks bad. I am either cleaning retarded(likely) or I need to refinish my bathtub(maybe both?) hahaha
...(omitted stuff too private....)
Hang in there, find a way to bloom where you are planted, even if it is only for a little while. And call me every day! That is my Dr prescription. Smile and give your hubby and the kids hugs from us!
Love, J

(I am not posting her replies, just mine)

Hey,
Thanks. Yeah, I think I inhaled a few fumes too many, I was loving life a LOT there for a few days! haha. Back to normal now. lol I knew I was missing something from the formula...salt! Dangit! Now I am out of lemons! {sigh} Oh, well, maybe next year.
My bangs are needing a trim, where are those darn scissors?? NOT! I think I will just let them grow until I can't see anymore, then I will pretend like Isabelle is you and we can have coffee together every morning! ;)
L grilled a ton of chicken yesterday. I saved you a plate so you better get down here quick before I make you eat mouldy chicken! Just kidding! But seriously...this week is a big week for me. I will be glad when it is over....
(....)
:( I need my best friend to pull me through this week. Yucky yucky stuff. So you better call me because I am going to send you email after email until you are going to think I am crazy, And you'll probably be right. I need my fix!

Kindergarten

2010-05-29T10:52:00.005-07:00

(Here he is with his teacher)
My sweet Dewey has done it. He has completed his first year of school. He has told me in the last week that he wants to be an actor, President of the United States, and an archaeologist! He can be anything he dreams of, I think the problem is going to be deciding!
It is hilarious to me that the pictures from the graduation are so exuberant! He was definitely at the top of his game, when it comes to hamming it up. He definitely takes after me, shyness at first or when with a large group of people, but loving performing in front of large crowds. His teacher was speechless.

Praise the Lord we lived through it!

Here is a picture that was taken in December, almost 6 months ago. I had him measured at his sister's well child appointment the other day, he has grown a full inch since December! In the picture, he is 46", if you can't see it. At the appointment, he measured 47"! I can't believe how much he has grown and changed this school year. He is an incredible child, such a special and kind soul. I am blessed to be his mother. I will work every day to help him discover his limitless potential and make the most of it.

The Big 1-0

2010-05-13T05:49:00.003-07:00

Ten years ago from this moment I was waking up alone for the last time. That day was the day a young girl looks forward to all her life. I wish I had thought ahead and had a picture to post! Ah, well, maybe I'll come back to it. It seems funny to be looking back so far when there are always so many things to look forward to. And it makes me feel old when normally I still feel young(and awkward, don't forget that part!) Last night L and I agreed to another 10, just to see where it takes us. The last decade has been exciting, that much is certain. Life with him is just so indescribably beautiful that while I can't wait for more happy years to come, I want to freeze time on every moment. Happy anniversary, husband. I love you.

Happy Mother's Day!

2010-05-10T13:27:00.003-07:00

This mommy had a rough week before Mother's Day. My dear children were mildly sick, but contagious. And so, my dear Dewey stayed home from school an entire week. Chiquita was glad to have someone to play with at first, but she soon tired of competing for toys and Mommy's attention. We all had a week-long case of the Crankies, I think. But there were many cute and quality moments to be had among the contagion(and doctor's appointments.)Here are one of the moments of cuteness I captured: The wedding of Barbie and Batman.

I purchased a second hand vintage Barbie house{and 80's clothes galore} for Chiquita a couple weeks ago, but had not sat down to play with it with her. Of course, once Mommy was playing, Dewey wanted to play. Since He was playing, his superheroes of all shapes and sizes had to crash the wedding. Barbie's dress was like the ghost of bad dresses past, with matching veil of spiky tulle! We did update it with some sassy ankle-strapped stillettos. Of course, Barbie being the amazon she is, the bride towered over the Bat-groom by half. We can't decide on their celebrity couple name though, Barman or Batbie? But still, it was cute to see the spectators lined up, dressed in their very best! You can see the Barbie side of the aisle and the superhero side, can't you? It really was the event of the season. Until the whole affair was broken up by the bad guys!

March Writing Journal of a Kindergartener

2010-04-12T15:56:00.002-07:00

March 2nd
I got crust(crushed) by a bldr.(boulder)
I am ufrad(afraid) of snac.(snake)
I see a bldr. (boulder)
I am in a log cabin.
I am the cat in the hat.

March 5th
I am in a game.
Mistr cat haw(how) long is your hat?
I am the uletic spidr-man. (electric spider-man??)
I see a leprcon.(leprechaun)
I am a fat cat.
How toll(tall)are you?

March 9th
I am a cunstrution man. (construction)
I am the ridlr. (riddler, from batman)
I am undr the site.(city)

March 12th
Come in me.
I am you.
I see cowe tiping. (cows typing{remember that book?})
Look at the cat.

March 23rd
I am spidr-boy.
I am on nopapr. (newspaper)
I tript irnman. (tripped ironman)

March 30th
I am a pilit.(pilot)
In my home I play.
I found a riddl. (riddle)
I liv(e) in a nest.

At the end of every month I laugh to see these. Not at the mistakes, of course, but at the flood of thoughts that go through my son's head all at once. But some of the spelling makes for a very interesting read! Enjoy!

Spring Break

2010-03-22T14:37:00.002-07:00

Spring break was such fun! Our first spring break since my boy started Kindergarten. Somehow it didn't feel like much of a break with all the running around we did! We toured one of the fire stations nearby, and had a great time! The firefighter who guided us had been injured while on duty, so he had nowhere else to be but to show the kids every inch of the gigantic station.

He even let the kids spray water! And forced some of the moms.

Afterward we were lucky enough to get to have lunch with Daddy, a rare occurance. My son was able to cash in a coupon he earned by reading books for a free pizza, a real treat! He is a reader now, officially. He stumbles on a few words here and there, and so had not considered himself a reader. Our nighttime reading ritual has switched from me reading the kids books to my son reading, with me as backup for hard words. He is finally thinking of himself as a reader and is gaining confidence. I love to see it! He is eager to read, not so much to write. He is a lefty, and apparently that makes for handwriting problems(darn D'Nealian! Monkey tails go the wrong way for a lefty!) but he seems to be ambidextrous in other instances because he can't decide which hand he wants to throw with or which side he wants to bat on in baseball. So we practice both, and got two gloves. Sorry for the rambling, stay tuned for more rambling and cute pictures! Practice tonight!

Busy Busy

2010-03-16T16:51:00.007-07:00

I have been a busy girl. Traveling, traveling, having lots of fun in lots of places. On Saturday we went to the Renaissance Festival. We have gone the last 3 years as a mini vacation and love it!

Barely Balanced, a comedy/acrobatic act that we loved. Their humor was right up my son's alley.

I rode an elephant for the first time with my daughter, who also rode a camel with her Auntie and rode a llama all by herself. Can you believe this girl??

Her brother would not be persuaded, but she could not be dissuaded. She ran right up to the platform and somebody had better put her on it! She had no fear whatsoever! As we were on top of the elephant, I gripped the rail for dear life as she giggled and said, "This is fun!"

There is so much to see, we always wish we had left earlier in the morning so we could spend more time there.

My Day Before 3:00

2010-03-11T14:35:00.003-07:00

1. Waking multiple times in the wee hours to howling winds.

2. Getting up to a light dusting of snow. It is like Mother Nature's personal message to me after a couple posts ago: DON'T TEASE ME OR MAKE FUN OF ME!!

3. Making a 3-egg cheese omelet for my son, then a 2-egg omelet for my still-sleeping daughter. My son ate them both. Every bite. And a biscuit. Truth. Making pancakes for my daughter instead.

4. Bundling up the kids to take my boy to school, where he and all of his friends made sure to point out that the large pile of vomit their classmate made in the grass yesterday was still there. And had frozen. And that classmate was back today. Praying for my son not to catch that stomach bug.

5. Skipping my walk due to freezing wind. A little sad to miss the gab-fest that accompanies the walk.

6.Watching Snow White multiple times with my daughter while rocking her in the rocking chair, then listening to a playlist I made for her. Singing at the top of our lungs, her punctuating my full belting with the few words she knows of each song. Highlight: Tomorrow, from Annie. Hearing her sing, "I love ya, tomorrow" making me cry. A confused look on her face as she sees the mascara that has smeared because of the tears, and asking "Mom, what is on your eye??"

7. Finally deciding to knock out my housework in one fell swoop, I start some laundry.

8. While I am starting said laundry, she discovers that a juice box makes a really great fountain. All over the floor. And the couch. Deciding that I will ban juice boxes. Having this resulting conversation after scolding my child for making the mess:
She: Mom?
Me: Yes?
She: Are you happy at me?
Me: No, not really. I am angry right now.
She: Mom, I'm your friend.
Me: I know, and I'm your mommy.

9. Adding "mop floor" to my list of chores that HAVE to be done today.

10. Finishing as many chores as I have time and energy for, and resolving not to drive myself crazy over the things I didn't get done.

11. Attempting to get my memory card to work and failing, giving up, rendering this post pictureless.

Bicycle

2010-03-09T16:35:00.002-07:00

This bicycle used to be my son's:

My husband and I bought it for his second birthday. Unfortunately, he outgrew it before he had a chance to really ride it much, and has now been upgraded to a larger and cooler Spiderman model. So this poor bike sat in the storage, lonely and gathering dust. So now my daughter, who is now ready for her first bike, will inherit it. However, I could not let her ride a boy bike. No, no, no, not this princess! And I couldn’t justify running out and buying another one when it is not her birthday or Christmas, so I(my husband, mostly) took it apart and painted it, then put it back together with a cute little princess accessory kit and Voila!!

A Princess bike! She loves it! Daddy pictured here putting the final touches on assembly:

I still have to attach some princess decals, but she was anxious to start riding, so this is the temporary finished product.

Enjoy this cute video, I can't believe she is pedaling already!

Baseball!

2010-03-08T10:12:00.000-07:00

Today is the day I become a baseball mom. My son was so excited he could not go to sleep last night. Of course, it didn’t help that my daughter kept getting out of bed to hide in his closet. And then he woke up bright and way-too-early this morning to ask his dad, “Am I going to play baseball today?” He could not get dressed or eat without asking questions about every detail that was going to happen, few of which I had answers to. And of course, we have to be having a cold and windy spell, hopefully no rain today during practice though.

I definitely do not feel like we are in Arizona right now. And definitely not Arizona in March. Never in my life have I seen such a long lasting, cold and wet winter here. It is supposed to be spring already! As I write, I see a little sun peeking through the curtains and I hope it will warm us up. Brr. If we are going to be freezing cold, the least Mother Nature could do is send us just a little snow to play in, to give us a reason to leave the house. Not a blizzard, just a couple inches would be great. And if not, then warm us up because it is baseball season here! Happy Monday!

What A Job

2010-03-05T10:53:00.000-07:00

I must confess, I was terribly cranky today. I thought about waiting to post until I am a bit more pleasant, but then you might not see me for a week or two. I was cranky this morning when I woke up, having been suffering an extra affliction or two on top of the normal, ready to go shopping for a new body(anyone have an extra lying around?) I was cranky even before my son hit his sister and threw three temper tantrums before school. I was cranky before getting a letter from his teacher about an "altercation" in gym class yesterday, and having to talk him down from yet another meltdown before heading into class because he had all but forgotten the incident(apparently he was teasing another boy and the boy hit him, not a major altercation but still a mood-spoiler.) I was cranky before my daughter decided she would rather argue in the middle of the street for 10 minutes than get back into the stroller so we could finish the last half block of our walk. Before she yelled at me as soon as I turned off the car that she did NOT want help with her seatbelt, and then running around the car multiple times because she did not want to go in the house. I was feeling cranky, but I felt like a saint for not losing patience and spanking or yelling at my kids.

I hate being cranky. It makes me crankier when I can't shake it off. So I picked out my favorite cd from about 2002, and cranked it up while I did the dishes, hoping to feel better once my kitchen was clean and I forgot my troubles. It almost worked, too. Until I did the last search for stray dishes before starting the dishwasher and discovered my darling daughter in the bathroom. Amidst a huge mess. Huge, cranky-inducing mess. Then I yelled. Nope. Not a saint. Then as I finished the dishes and picked out the toothbrush, toothpaste, toilet paper roll, and the entire contents of the bathroom trash out of the toilet before scrubbing(and plunging and praying it would ever flush again,) I found myself thinking that I wished I could quit this job. Hand in my resignation and find a different job. One that pays better, or at all, and one where I could better use my talents, which apparently are not keeping my children out of trouble while simultaneously keeping the house clean. Then I told myself that most mothers probably feel this way in a moment of weakness at least once, so I was not going to beat myself up for an errant thought that popped into my head. I am just going to finish my chores, and keep on going. Because this job does have its unbearable moments, moments when you just want to break down and cry and admit that you can't do it. But in reality, these awful days are the exception, rather than the rule.
I never realized before having kids the extent to which my life would be changed. How every thought and every decision would revolve around them and what was best for them, for the rest of my life. This is not a job you quit when it gets hard. This is a job you have to stick it out and find a way to not only live through it, but to make it better on the really cranky days, like this one. So naptime will come a little early today for my daughter, and I will find a way to shake the crankies in time to get my son from school. I wish I could pop a couple ibuprofen and feel better. But since I can't, a little down time will have to do.

This is love

2010-03-03T13:18:00.000-07:00

On my way out the door this morning, while herding the children into the car like cattle, I found a sweet note from my husband hidden in my purse. I won’t quote it, I will keep his dear words to myself, but suffice it to say that it was just lovely.

He comes into the bedroom most mornings where I am usually still sleeping to kiss me before heading out on his daily hour-long commute to work. I get up a few minutes later to a warm house with a fire in the fireplace waiting for me. He has not complained once this winter about being the first one up in the cold and starting a fire for us. I have even heard him outside chopping wood before 6am. What a doll this man is! And still he found time to tear a corner from his notebook to leave a darling message for me.

He is such a big part of my life. If he wasn’t around, I would not have the life I do. I would not be able to cope with the never-ending doctor appointments, procedures, medical bills and disappointments that have become such a big part of my life. My burden is too heavy for me to bear alone. I’m glad I have such a strong husband to help me bear it. Especially on mornings like this one, where I woke in pain and so grumpy. It took a huge effort on my part to have patience with my children as we all dressed and ate breakfast. They were no different than usual, we were not running late, but still I felt like I was on edge. My husband may never know how he changed my day this morning from bad to good. When I saw his little note, I somehow found the patience and energy to get us all there happily and to take my morning walk when all I had wanted to do was crawl back in bed and call in sick. Even as I write this, the ache is gnawing at me, but I am going to get through today. And maybe tomorrow I will get through tomorrow, knowing I have a partner who will help me, but needs me to pull through until he gets here.

February Journal

2010-03-01T13:04:00.000-07:00

My darling son writes in a monthly journal at school. The things he writes are so precious I have decided to post them here, I have included original spelling, with my explanations in parenthesis:

February 8th:
What did you sa. (say)
Do you know let(that) it is my birthday
Hos(Whose) birthday is it.
I luv you.

February 12th:
I am a man.
I have sopr moreo.(Super Mario)
I am yr best frend.
Do you like me.

February 16th:
I am up in the sci(sky).
Today is valintimes day!
I luv you
February 23rd:
I so(saw) a ibol.(I saw an eyeball???)
I am fliing(Flying) to my mom and dad.
I so(saw) a bug.
I luv my swedr(sweater).

February 26th:
I can see batmann vs the jokr.
See the bat lit(light).
I can see man-bat.
I can see ban(Bane, a bad guy from Batman.).
What is batman seecret.

Can you believe this is the writing of a kindergartner? Every month we have read his work and giggled at how cute it is, but I hope this is how all five year olds think. He writes sweet little things about us and his sister, hidden among the superheroes of his latest obsession, right now it is batman.

Two Months: excuses, excuses

2010-03-01T12:33:00.000-07:00

It has been two months since I have been here. And a new year is well underway with nary a word. Shame on me. I haven't been taking pictures, so that is one good excuse. I have been too busy living my life to blog about it, or think for that matter. But here is the smelliest excuse of all: ready? I have been feeling a little exposed lately. Between my blog and Facebook, far too many people have been exposed to what goes on in my life. Heaven forbid I have a bad day, or a moment of weakness, and hit the "Share" button before my better judgement stops me. And just like that, my bad mood is out there for the world to see. And if I misspelled something, even worse.
My blog has always been my happy place, a world where I do not put my daily annoyances on display, at least until I am able to laugh about them. So when I don't blog for two months, it kinda looks like I have had no happy moments to speak of in that time. That is terrible of me, because that is not the case.
All my life I have had a case of boredom. Things are exciting for me, and I feel motivated, only when they are new and challenging. Once things start to become routine, I get bored and move on to a new challenge(read: I have not yet mastered the motherly and wifely duties, as they are constantly changing and always challenging!) Not a strength of mine and not something I am proud of, as I never seem to stick with things(except the wife and mother-thing!) So I think I will change my attitude about my blog right about now.
This will no longer be my happy place alone. This is my not-just-a-mommy blog, where in between cleaning up messes and kissing booboos, I actually have thoughts that are worth preserving and sharing. I promised someone to try not to try so hard to be so easy. Got that?? No? What I mean is, I have opinions, and I may share them from time to time, and you might not agree with them. I definitely do not agree with many of the opinions I hear, but I have never attacked anyone for disagreeing with me. I ask for the same courtesy from you, many many loyal readers. You probably will disagree with me at some point, and I welcome your well thought-out and factually based opinions, but be nice, please. I am striving to show more of me here, and unfortunately, lately I am not always the perfectly dressed and coiffed version of myself. More often these days, I am the yoga pants-wearing, big sunglasses to hide my lack of makeup, mom dropping off one child at school before bribing the other with lollipops to sit in the stroller long enough for me to get in a walk before showering for the day. Yep, that's me. Wave if you see me, but no honking please. I already know I'm looking hot. And yes, I just tripped over my own foot.

Feeling Thankful...Post-Christmas letter.

2009-12-28T10:14:00.001-07:00

I think I am a little backwards this season. Today I am feeling thankful. I think I am about a month and a week late for this feeling to be coming on strong, but that is me these days. I am thankful to be alive, I am thankful for my family. I am thankful for this week of not-so-busy schedule and for my two sweet children to be playing together so nicely. I am thankful to have had many Christmas parties to attend, even if I had to skip a couple, because that means we have many friends and family who love us. I am thankful to have had another year with the people I love.

I am thankful for this beautiful girl. She amazes everyone around her with her crazy smartness, even as she cracks us up with the funny things that come out of her mouth, like in this picture, she is singing:

And in this one, she is thinking about what she wants for Christmas: hmm.....

I am so very thankful for my son, and his maturity and kindness. I forget sometimes that he is five years old, sometimes we have conversations as if he is an adult. He had a Christmas list for himself, of course, but he was just as excited to pick out gifts for other people in the family, as well. He wanted to find a Cowboys action figure for his aunt Sonya, and Twilight action figures for me(seeing a theme here?) He is such a special soul and is going to be an amazing man someday.

And then there are these two crazy kids:

We have been together 14 years now and are approaching our 10th wedding anniversary, already. A long time ago from these days:

(In case you missed this picture from a couple posts ago, or wanted a better comparison picture.)

How time flies when you're having fun! My, how we have grown up. Just the other day we were talking about the ways we had changed, and the ways we'd stayed the same. We have learned a lot about ourselves in the last year or two. We have learned how to stick together in times of crisis, and what it takes to endure hard times when they seem to be never ending. We have learned to embrace the fun and joy in life, even when you only get tiny glimpses of it in your day. We have gained a new appreciation for each other, and the different things we do to support each other. We love the family we have created together, and wouldn't trade it for anything in the world. I am thankful for the boy in this picture, as well as the man in the picture above. They are the same, but different to me. I love them both. The boy always had a smile on his face. He had many friends, but managed to make me feel like I was the only person in the world. The man is still a dreamer, like the boy, but now he takes action. He works hard to make his dreams come true, then he always has a new dream ready to work toward. He handles things with maturity. He is loyal and selfless to a fault. He is an incredible man. Being the boy and having that side peek out from time to time is so precious. Seeing him play and joke with his son and being wrapped around his daughter's tiny little pinkie finger warms my heart. He is an amazing dad.

So this is why I am feeling thankful today.

Decisions, Decisions

2009-12-15T11:13:00.002-07:00

I need your help, my faithful readers(the one or two of you.) My dear sister recently took our pictures and I can't decide which is my favorite. So please help: Here is number one:

Number two:

Number Three:

Number Four:

Number Five:

Number Six:

Please pay no mind to the cranky looking child on the left. She may, quite possibly, be the most beautiful little girl on the planet who hates having her picture taken more than anything in the world. Thanks in advance for your help! Please vote in the poll to your right.

Why Are the Holidays So Hard?

2009-12-11T10:11:00.000-07:00

As I sat feeling so sad and sorry for some unfortunate people this Christmas season, it occured to me: Why are the holidays so hard? So stressful and depressing for some? This is definitely a tough time of year, especially with these tough economic times. Why do we let it get to us at Christmastime? It should be a time for celebration and love, not inadequacy and sadness. It seems like people either feel stressed out about trying to afford everything they want to give their family, not being able to afford those things, or charging up the credit cards in an attempt to give their families a "good Christmas."
I have a theory this Christmas: There will always be one more thing you would like to get, one more gift under the tree and Christmas will feel complete. Or so you think. But get that last thing and you will remember another thing that would be just perfect. Or one child's gift cost just a bit less than the other, so you need to spend an equal dollar amount on both while still making sure they have the same number of gifts to open, so you have to buy another, smaller gift for child #1. It is neverending, if you let it be. For some reason this bothers me more this Christmas than in Christmases past. I think it may be because while my children have made their Christmas lists, there are so many big gifts I would like to get them that are not on their lists. And it would be so easy to talk myself into it. Like a new swingset that will support my dear son's weight. That would be so nice in the backyard. Or a trampoline. So many fond memories I have from growing up. But if I were to get everything on their lists and everything on my list for them, not only would I have gone way overboard, but what would be left for next year? A car? And then I think how lucky we are to have utilities paid every single month, let alone being able to have Christmas gifts at all. So many people are not going to have those things this year. I remember the small amount of charity work I did last year and being concerned about teaching my son to appreciate the things he has and the gifts he gets. I suppose I will ponder again on this next year.
Son is struggling with understanding why he does not have every toy he wants and every single toy every other kid he knows has. He has enough toys and clothes for three kids, yet there is always something he can find that he doesn't have. How do I stop the cycle and teach him to start appreciating what he has? Because there are millions of adults who never learned that lesson, and they have billions of dollars in credit card debt to prove it. This year, I have food to eat, a roof over my head, a husband and two beautiful and healthy children who I would give my life for. I have things to complain about, tons of things, but I am alive and breathing. Which is more than some can say. So this Christmas, please join me in celebrating what you have, don't worry about what you don't. Stop running around and enjoy your loved ones while you can. They will be grown up and gone before you know it. So what if you couldn't get them every single thing you wanted to for Christmas? I think it is a good lesson to learn that they may not get everything on their list, but they may get some things that were not on their list. Life doesn't always give you what you want or think you deserve, but you have to make the most of it. Merry Christmas to all of you.

Happy Birthday Dear Husband...

2009-12-10T14:54:00.001-07:00

Today is the special day my husband was born, many(but one less than me) years ago. So today, he is a year younger than me(again.) Yesterday he was two years younger than me. I felt like such a cougar. But today, for another 10 months, I am only one year older than he. Who cares, right? I do. Maybe when we are 90 and 91 one tiny little year won't seem so much, but 29 and 30...wow. Who is that old broad he's married to? With a little help from Oil of Olay(I guess I should buy some) I hope to age slower than he does so that in 10-20 years, I will look younger than him. I am hoping his gray hair comes in quickly, that will help. Just kidding.....but am I?

So I struggle every year with making sure my darling has a good birthday. I always buy his presents waaaaay too early and can't hold out, so he has had his birthday(and Christmas) presents for months now. So every year I sigh when the event comes 'round. What else can I do to make his birthday memorable? Like the year my son was born, and was four months old. My dear partner woke me gently and whispered, "Do you know if I have any clean underwear?" True Story. I did manage to find a pair for him, but still. Bad wife of the year. So this year what can I do but write a loving and sweet tribute to him that he will read again and again. Aren't I already doing that? Hmmm...it doesn't look like it. New Paragraph.

Happy Birthday, my darling husband. I remember the first birthday I shared with you. You were turning 15, and we were at a rehearsal for the Messiah, when our choir director requested it of us. I remember thinking, "Oh, crap. He is just turning 15!" I was really feeling like a cougar in those days. But I know how you love it. We have been through many many years since then, some easier and some tougher. But somehow we have made it through all of them together every day. I look forward to sharing many more birthdays with you, and I promise that each one will be more special than the last.

Here we are at 17 and 18, I think:

See the stars in our eyes? Ah, young love.

And here we are, last weekend.

Sorry, for some reason this one wouldn't go any bigger. And maybe you don't want to see our wrinkles up close anyway. I didn't. Just kidding. I hope you have a great birthday, babe.

Another Proud Moment

2009-11-30T16:52:00.000-07:00

Pride is supposed to be a deadly sin, right? So maybe that is the big sin I am guilty of. So why don't I feel guilty? I am so proud of my family. They impress me daily with things they learn and accomplish.
Today I'll share how proud I am of my husband. He works so hard to provide for our family. He is the reason I am able to be a stay at home mom with my children, which is something that is very important to me, as you may have guessed, seeing as how you have memorized my every blogging word, I'm sure. And if that wasn't a good enough reason to be proud of him, he has been studying for 5 years straight. On top of being gone 11 1/2 hours a day, he has stayed up at night nearly every night with numerous dry and heavy texts. And taken many expensive and excruciating exams. But now with all of his effort he has accomplished one of his long-term goals: he now can claim the title of Certified Building Official. This means he now has extra initials of C.B.O. behind his signature and qualifies for many exciting positions for Building Officials all over the country. He is a hot commodity, let me tell you. And his skills are much sought after outside of our home, as well. {wink}
And all this from a man who gets up at 5am to chop wood and start a fire so his family can wake up to a warm house.
How could it possibly be a sin to be proud of all of that? Well, I do not apologize for it. I am proud to be married to such a man. I am proud of all his accomplishments and I am proud of him as a person. I am proud to walk beside him on this long journey we call life.

How to Go to the Grocery Store Alone With Small Children, Step by Step

2009-11-12T17:01:00.002-07:00

1. Make sure the scheduled grocery trip is nowhere near naptime. Or before mealtimes.
2. Bring snacks, stop for a Happy Meal if necessary. Don't skip this step. Seriously, a tiny box of raisins, a Dum Dum, a pack of fruit snacks. Anything.
3. Park near the cart area. Like right next to it, so you can have good manners and return the cart without a long walk after. Stay away from the car carts that have your child seated 10 feet in front of you. Keep your enemies close, so to speak. Not to mention, those carts are very hard to steer, as many knocked-over boxes can attest. See #7.
4. Bring baby wipes. Just do.
5. Chatter to your kids about every little thing you can distract them with(Ooh look, there are the lobsters, let's go say "Hi!"{aka look away from the doughnuts})
6. Steer clear of the candy aisle. This should go without saying.
7. Drive the cart as fast as you dare, especially through snack and cereal aisles. Apologize profusely to every shopper you crash into. Which is most of them.
8. "Ooh and Aah" profusely over the various fruits and veggies, especially those on sale. "Ooh, Canteloupe, my favorite! Oh My Gosh! Let's get one!" "Would you like to help me cook this awesome cauliflower? It looks like a brain!"
9. Kids are going to spot every cartoon character item dangling in front of them. They are everywhere, and kids won't miss a one. So you say..."Say hello to the princess...have a good day, princesses! Oh look! Cheerios! How exciting! And look! Around the corner is chicken! Yum!" Zoom away. Distract.
10. Keep moving at all times. Do not stop the cart to comparison shop. Eyeball it as you approach and grab it as you pass. Do not stop. Do. Not. Stop.
11. Choose your checkout line. Eyeball the cashier. Does he or she look friendly? Fatherly, Motherly, grandmotherly? If he or she is already scowling, they won't have patience for you and your mountain of groceries. Or your kid(s.)
12. Checkout. Have your child "help" you unload the groceries onto the conveyer belt. Hand them small items as fast(or faster) as they can unload them so they don't have one moment to scope out the candy ever so conveniently placed at their eye level directly behind them.
13. If you manage to complete steps 1-12, go ahead, reward the kids with a candy bar, if they are on sale. Praise them until you lose your voice on how well they did and how fun it was to take them to the store.
14. If things don't go so well, breathe. Like if your 4 year old son thinks he can muscle 2 gallons of milk simultaneously onto the conveyor. And misses. And drops a gallon on the third try. And it splatters all over the whole world. And you want to crawl in a hole and die. Breathe. This is not the end of the world. Chances are, the cashier and bagger will feel sooo bad for you, they will clean up the mess with a smile and take your groceries to your car without even asking if you want them to. Don't cry until you get to the car. Or if you load up on two weeks' worth of groceries successfully but get to the car and it won't start. In the dead heat of an Arizona June. Breathe. Cry, just a little. But tomorrow it will be in the past. And you will call someone who loves you to come and rescue you. And they will. And the next trip we will try, try again.
I will stop here, because #10 is long past, I won't make it to #20, and I like the number 14, personally. So here are my super secret Super Mom secrets to grocery shopping. They are not foolproof, see above. Nor are they to be taken quite literally. I write tongue-in-cheek. I hope you realize that when reading most of my posts. Please know what that means.

My lovely children...

2009-11-02T09:52:00.000-07:00

are famous. Not really, but my up-and-coming photographer sister in law took some amazing pictures of them in a real live photo shoot. She did such a fantastic job, especially considering that while my children may be among the best looking in the world, they are also ranked among the wiggliest and least cooperative subjects. Put me to shame, she did. Want to see her work? Glad you asked... see her amazing photos here and my children's sneek peek here. Incredible, seriously, click. Isabelle did have one swipe of mascara applied for effect, in case you were wondering. I'm terrible, I know.

Awww!

2009-10-16T19:01:00.000-07:00

Look what I got from my darling tonight. He is so sweet. I won't lie, I did drop a hint a couple weeks ago, but he remembered and picked these up on his way home from work for me. I love them, I love that they are not cut and still alive(ask me again in a couple weeks as to whether they still are) and so cute. Now I am off to google how to take care of them, as I have been born with a black thumb. I hope you have a lovely weekend with your loved ones. Cherish them every day.

His Father's Son

2009-10-16T07:40:00.001-07:00

Yes, that is my son doing multiple pullups on his father's pullup bar. He is quite the strong boy, but he is our only son so we didn't think he was out of the ordinary. Then we watched this TV show about this little Hercules boy(I don't remember exactly what they called him) and we laughed the whole time. We said, "That kid is nothing out of the ordinary! This is ridiculous, making such a big deal because this kid is strong." Well, either there was no reason to make a TV show over that kid, or Son is just as amazing, because here is my bad(he was in the dimly lit hall and his dad was spotting) photographic evidence that Son does the same thing. He also does two handed swings with a 20-pound kettlebell, 10 at a time. He lifted his friend up(who is the same age) and put him on his shoulders, helping him climb. When his sister was born, he was almost 3. He used to pick her up and carry her around the waist. People were shocked that I let him pick up his sister, but I figured that it was better to let him and make sure he was being safe than have him do it while I was not around. I thought nothing of him being that strong even then. When he laughs hard or yells, you can see his six-pack. He has biceps and pectorals at 5 years old, and has had them all along. And we don't have him in gymnastics or karate to try to push him to get strong. He just is. Like I said, he is his father's son. And he has brains. Look out world!

You can Thank Me Later

2009-10-15T19:41:00.000-07:00

As you may know, I am a creative cook. After a long hiatus, I have finally started writing down new recipes I have created. I have generously decided to share with you again and I've posted them on my recipe blog. Why should my family be the only ones who benefit from my fabulousness in cooking? Please weigh in and tell me what you think. I have made up most of the recipes on my blog, the ones that are not solely mine are noted, so be nice.

Happy Birthday to Me

2009-10-15T09:25:00.001-07:00

I decided last year that I was never going to reveal my age again. A lady never does, you know. Son would ask me how old I was and I would tell him it was a secret, all he ever needs to know is that his mommy is young and beautiful. True story, but obnoxious, right? (right)

So last year I turned none-of-your-business, and this year I thought I was going to turn a-lady-never-reveals-her-age. But apparently with age comes wisdom, and who cares, really? So this year I turned 30. Maybe next year I will turn a-lady-never-reveals....

My dear sister showed up with a present for me first thing in the morning(self portraits to follow of me in my lovely pink ensemble,) Then a visit from a dear friend with yet another one. Numerous texts and calls and messages later, I am feeling pretty popular this year. 30 may not be so bad, or were they all just feeling pity for the old lady?

My darling husband took the day off to pamper me, and in doing so sent an email to his director telling her that I was celebrating my 29th birthday. Heehee, I guess the lies were taking effect on him finally. And now I ruined it by coming out with the truth. Darnit, will I never be able to lie effectively?

And he made from-scratch pancakes for me. All by himself for the first time(with a little stirring from a lovely assistant.) I just helped tell him the recipe(I guess I should write it down for future generations to know of my splendiferous pancakes.[Oh, wait, I think I kinda posted it on my recipe blog already{note to self.}]

Then we went for a romantic dinner to a lovely place we hadn't been in many years. It was almost quiet. We did make a small mistake in choosing a secluded table in the corner. There was a very talkative person at the next table, so talkative that I think the whole restaurant listened to him prattle on. The whole time. I whispered at one point to L, "Has he even stopped to take a bite?" Apparently he had, but somehow the one-sided chatter hadn't been interrupted long enough for me to notice. It was sorta funny, and the food was delicious, so we didn't mind too much. We just stared into each other's eyes in between checking out the numerous tattoos on the waiter. It was really quite romantic. Then a romantic trip to a not-so-romantic store that I will not name. Luckily, I wore my "comfortable" heels. Meaning I can shop blister-free, but not pain-free. Beauty is pain. My mantra for this year. Then to pick up the kids from my lovely sister/sitter-for-the-night. Then back home for comfy clothes and TV shows. All in all, one of the best birthdays I've had. So I might as well celebrate it. With a giant ice cream cake.

The End.

A Change

2009-10-08T11:25:00.000-07:00

Thanks to a dear friend, I have made a small decision. I am going to lay low(er), www-wise. I have been thinking about ways to keep myself and my family more secure online. I did not want to privatize my blog and exclude some family members from being able to see it, so I have changed my URL and removed all of our names. If you know us, you have the pleasure of knowing our names and locations. If not, you shall be doomed to forever wonder. Sorry, them's the breaks. So let me introduce myself. My name is J, a woman, wife and mother, among other things. My husband is L, and we have two gorgeous children, whose names for this purpose, are Son and Daughter(or Sister and Brother, depending on my mood.) We live in a cute little town near a cute little city in a cute biggish state.

Why continue blogging at all, you ask? Well, thanks so much for caring! My blog makes me happy! I love looking back at the cute pictures and my cuter commentary(sorry, a little ego here, the pictures are probably cuter, especially if my darling husband takes them.) It makes me smile to look at it, and makes me look at the positive things in my life, as I have promised myself that I will never vent or complain here. It is my oasis, my utopia of all things happy big and small(Utopia...20+ year old inside joke.) So I will continue to write, to cheer myself and you up. You're welcome.

My Little Hobby

2009-10-02T10:47:00.000-07:00

My daughter has a new obsession...ponies. Many thanks to a dear friend who handed down many lovely ponies and a pony castle to entertain for years to come.

And the ponies have hair. Lots of hair. Nylon hair.

It tangles even easier than this beautiful girl's hair. Hard to believe, but true.

Her hair is a blessing and a curse.

So my new hobby: combing hair. Pony hair needs fixing every time she wants to play, my job is getting them combed up and ready. Combing my darling daughter's hair day in and day out. Combing my son's hair every single day before school. Then we arrive at school and I think that combing hair has gone out of style. My son seems to be in an overwhelming minority of children, both male and female, who have their hair combed before school. When did the bedhead look jump from the runway to the playground? I must have missed that, but regardless of how pointless or out of style it may be, still I comb. And will continue to comb for many years.

Why Silence is NOT Golden...

2009-09-18T15:19:00.002-07:00

At least in our house.

Quiet kids who are supposed to be napping can get into a lot of trouble and redecorate the bathroom in a delightful shade of bubble-gum flavored toothpaste blue, mixed in with a pot of Mommy's makeup. And all without making a peep.

And somehow I could not manage to keep a straight face while scolding her. And because I grabbed the camera to take a picture, somehow she knew she would not be in that much trouble, she giggled the whole time.

Until the schmear got into her eyes and she started rubbing her face against my jeans as I ran her bath. Somehow, I could not find any sympathy for her. Anywhere. Strange.

A Bicycle, A Scooter, and a Dog

2009-09-17T10:20:00.002-07:00

Son got a new bicycle for his birthday, and Daughter got a scooter for hers. This is the Year of the Wheels in our family, I think. Son is also the proud owner of skates and a skateboard, and a little patience to learn how to use them. Daughter also inherited brother's old bike and got a princess tricycle for her birthday. So they are on wheels as often as possible, so far no major injuries to report...yet. I'm sure they're coming.

And they got a cute new dog named Fiona. She is their new best friend, especially Daughter. She won't let anyone who comes over hold or pet her. Fifi is HER dog! And Son has not had a problem with his allergies from her, which is a small miracle. She is a mix of a few breeds, all of them are supposed to be low-allergy, and we got lucky. She is so pretty and white, but there is some time involved keeping her that way! So here is our new family member, Fifi:

Let's Get Cracking

2009-09-08T16:10:00.000-07:00

Let's fix the health care system ourselves. Anyone interested? Hey, if Fantasy Footballers are running rampant this time of year, can't we have Fantasy Heathcare Reform? Maybe we can come up with some money-saving ways to get better health care. I am tired of hearing complaints about how the people in charge are not doing a good job...let's give them a boost. What things do you like about the current health care system? What things have got to go? I do not want to argue about health care reform, or hear any negativity any more. I have had enough. I just want to pretend. What would we like to see, in a perfect world, from our medical system? I'll get you started...

1. Salary caps. For Doctors, Hospital administrators, CEO's of the drug companies, insurance companies...you name 'em. Just like the NFL(although I have heard rumor of the salary caps going away next season...)
2. Limits on what hospitals and Doctors are allowed to charge. I know I am not the only one who looks at the details of their hospital bill in shock and awe... $5.00 for ONE ibuprofen? The outrageous amounts that are charged to the insurance companies have got to stop. Likewise, they knock the prices down when the insurance company haggles them. There should be a set price for what health care costs, and it should be kept to a minimum.
3. A person should not be denied healthcare they are needed. If they have insurance and their doctor determines that a procedure is necessary, it should be covered.
4. Doctors need to learn how to do their jobs. I am sorry, but in the extensive experience I have had with many doctors in the last two years, they seem to be playing a very expensive guessing game. With my money, not theirs. I have been to more wasted appointments where nothing was accomplished, consults, followups, et cetera, than I can count. Not only is this monetarily wasteful, it causes unnecessary time wasted for the patient in pain and frustration. Doctors should know how to treat a patient, and if they are unable to diagnose, they should do more than throw their hands up and leave the patient to find a doctor who knows how to help them. They should care enough to find another doctor who can really help the patient, otherwise they should not be doctors themselves. See the hippocratic oath.
5. We, as patients, need not to waste our doctors' time. Not to mention our insurance companies'(read: our) money. We need to better educate ourselves on when a doctor visit is needed, when emergency care is needed, and when rest and time will best serve our recovery. Emergency rooms are crowded with non-emergencies and people who cannot get in to see their primary doctor. People cannot get in to see their primary doctor because their offices are crowded with people who are there for a virus or cold which the doctor can do nothing for. It is an endless cycle that we need to break.
6. I laughed out loud to hear someone outraged at the healthcare reform, saying they wanted to be able to choose their own doctor. I can't choose to see whatever doctor I want. Not if I want my insurance to pay for the visit. I have to choose from a book put out by my insurance company of doctors who are under contract with them. My most recent new doctor does not have a contract with my insurance company, or probably yours. Maybe Medicare, I think, but that is the only one. I was specifically told that he may be the man to fix my long and ongoing problem. What choice do I have? Pay for the visits out of my pocket. And that is just one example. Heaven forbid you get sick while you are...gasp...out-of-network! How dare you go on vacation! Shameful! The point of #6 is that I can't choose my own doctor under the current system. And I am not pretending to know everything(or anything) about the proposed reform.
7. Insurance companies should be charities. Non-profit(or not-for profit) organizations. They should be focused on helping and healing, not making money and greed. Or they should go the way of the Dodo bird. Extinct.

That's all I have for today. Leave a comment and I will add on more and credit you for your contribution. Please leave out negativity, constructive criticism and opposing viewpoints welcome as long as you tell me how pretty I am. ;)

Oops

2009-09-01T09:05:00.004-07:00

I downloaded quite a few pictures from my camera to show off. I think Pride is my deadly sin. Because I don't think any of the others quite fit me, and I know for sure that I must have one, so I'm guessing it's pride. But every now and then something happens to humble me. Like when I realize that 80% of the otherwise beautiful pictures I was going to brag about are a little...funny looking. And then I examine my camera and there is a CSI-worthy fingerprint right on the lens that gave a nice cloudy glow to my pictures. Not that I intended to brag about my photographic prowess, I was going to brag about the beauty of my life and the subjects of the pictures, not the photos themselves, so I suppose as long as I tell a good story with them you will forgive the cloudy fingerprinted-lensed pictures, just pretend I got a filter and made them that way on purpose for me.

Daughter is 2 now. And she has all the wisdom of a 22-year old. Which, I suppose, is not that much more, is it? But now that she is so grown up and mature she wants to help me cook our meals. I let her help, stirring, measuring mostly, but now she has decided that she is old enough to scramble eggs. She lets me help so she doesn't get burned, so I let her cook.

But then, last week, she decided that she didn't need my help at all any more.

She has also figured out how to undo the child lock we have installed on the refrigerator. While I was occupied washing sheets, she decided to scramble some eggs all by herself. Two dozen of them. But although I should be thankful she did not attempt to scramble them on the stove, strangely I am not. I emerged from the laundry to discover cracked eggs all over the bathroom, kitchen, dining room, living room, and dog. I wish I'd had the presence of mind to take a few pictures before the long and drawn-out cleaning process, so I can guilt-trip her with them until she is 30, or until I die. But the smell was too much. I may never eat eggs again. On the bright side...the floors got nice and shiny clean again, and again, and again.....and I got to see a dear friend who rushed over to help with the cleanup and smell removal, bless her heart.

Two-gether

2009-08-18T11:14:00.004-07:00

This morning my children were up early. Far too early for my taste. But I have been thinking about them and their relationship and how it has changed recently.

Brother is at school all day now, so sister is alone most of the day with me. Bored.

But something else has happened. They have started sharing a room. It started during the summer when Son asked to sleep in Daughter's room and we made a big bed on the floor for them to camp out in. But somehow, she ended up sleeping in Son's room every night. Every night I ask her where she wants to sleep and every night she answers, "I want sleep in Brudda's room." So every night I put them to bed together and put the lights out, with only some quiet music to keep them company. I warn them that if there is any funny business, they will be separated. Not once have I had to separate them. Daughter's room is all but abandoned. Son has no longer had a problem with nightmares and they both sleep peacefully all night.

They have become inseparable. They were singing together as they read books before lights out last night, the songs they listen to at bedtime..."Hot Potato" and "Hickory Dickory Dock." And Son asked if we could have Hot Potatoes for dinner tonight. They pounded their spoons at the breakfast table this morning in rhythm together. They fight, of course, it would be unnatural if they didn't, but they are best friends. They miss each other when they are away from each other. I just need the key to keeping their relationship this way when they hit the teenage years...with each other and with me. These precious times will seem so short when they are grown, already they have flown.

The downside? Son woke up at 5:30, and since Daughter was nearby, she was about 5 seconds behind. Is it bedtime yet?

5 years in pictures

2009-08-11T22:25:00.008-07:00

Oh, how my life is different than 5 short years ago. This sweet boy came into my life and changed it forever at 6:13pm.

And just for your entertainment, here is a short picture essay of his life thus far:

This year is a big milestone for him and I wanted to make it special. I baked two kinds of muffins to bring to his Kindergarten class. Homemade from scratch, of course, is there any other way? Blueberry, and then Banana chocolate chip(my invention) were a big hit with the class.

Then our fantastic daddy took off of work a couple hours early to surprise Son! We took a special surprise birthday trip, since his party isn't until the weekend and we wanted to do something special for him on the right day. Our first Toros game since they have been back. It is, of course, a school night, so we only stayed for about half the game, but it is the experience that counts for them(I hope.)

Bubblegum and cheesecake-flavored ice cream(separately, not mixed) were the favorite treats of the night. It was a great opportunity to teach Son about good sportsmanship and how everybody strikes out, etc. I just prayed we wouldn't see any big-league temper tantrums(we didn't, thank goodness!)

And Daughter has a new love: Tuffy the Toro mascot. The whole time that was all she would talk about was Tuffy, if she saw him it was "I see him! There he is!" and if she didn't: "Where Tuffy go? Where is he?" And when we left she said over and over, "I had fun with Tuffy."

"Das' Tuffy!" check the pointing finger

PS:Son wanted nothing to do with Daughter's new boyfriend, Tuffy.

Proof

2009-08-07T16:07:00.005-07:00

My daughter may, quite possibly, be the cutest thing ever to walk the earth. And here is today's proof:

I heard her count flawlessly from one to ten from around the corner, but there are only four magnets she was playing with. By the time I grabbed the camera and snuck back to video her, she was counting from four up and missing eight. Still cute as can be. And she's barely two, so cut her a break.

First Day of School

2009-08-06T09:30:00.004-07:00

My sweet boy started Kindergarten this week. School for real this year.

There were many mom-tears on the school grounds as moms kissed their kids goodbye for a few long hours until school was over. Mine, surprisingly, did not flow. I managed a cool "See ya, Dude. Have a good day. Be good, I'll be back when school is over! Love ya!" No tears. Amazing for this mom who tears up at the smallest thing when her kids are involved. But maybe that is what he needed. Cool mom, reassuring him that it's no big deal to go to school and I will see him soon.

Daddy took the whole day off to be there to drop him off and pick him up from school. That is a pretty big deal in our family.

But, of course, we forgot to take our camera to the school, so these few cool shots L took before leaving are all we have of the first day of school. Oh, well, he looks soooo cool on his birthday skateboard. I suppose I can cheat and bring the camera to the school tomorrow.

It had to be done

2009-07-30T12:31:00.007-07:00

I didn't want to do it. I swore I would never do it. I swore that a pair of scissors would never desecrate my daughter's gorgeous locks of curly hair. But I had to do it. When wet, the curls straightened almost to her tailbone. But when dry, they tangled so easily. Especially after sleeping. The top layer of hair just needed a little tiny trim. So, we had time alone together and a good opportunity and I did it today.

Here is the before picture:

Just kidding, this is a couple weeks old, but I thought it was cute. You know, the typical "before" picture when people look almost intentionally bad. I don't have any pictures that really showed the length in the back, but here is one I took yesterday:

It only shows the front view, but you get the picture. Cutting my only daughter's hair for the first time is a big deal for me, a tragedy as well as a reason for celebration.

Aaaaaaannnnd Affftteeeeeerr!

Ok, so maybe you don't see a huge difference. Bad photography. But I do, and hopefully now her hair can be healthier and easier to take care of.

Like the model pose? She moves too fast to capture...literally a blur.

The back view, if I had a before back view you could really tell a difference, it is much shorter. So here's hoping we can go through one less gallon of conditioner and detangler a month!

Homework from Joan Horner

2009-07-30T09:00:00.004-07:00

(co-founder of Premier Designs) as I have loosely translated...
1. Start each day with a smile. A smile makes the spirit joyful.
2.Smile more often. Nobody likes to look at a frown on our faces. When the heart is sad the spirit is crushed.
3.Give an encouraging word to each person you are with during the day. Be positive. Be cheerful with your family.

If you do not do this...
You will be sad. When the heart is sad, the spirit is broken. "When Mom ain't happy, ain't nobody happy!" The tone of the family is set by the mother. Just one person.

Confessions and Pictures

2009-07-28T20:57:00.010-07:00

I am afraid that in the positive spirit I am attempting to keep on my blog, I fear I may mislead some people into thinking I am perfect. Suuuuper Moommmm!!! And always super positive every minute of every day. So here is my confession to you...some things that are not perfect about me, in true Gracias form...not all to be taken literally. And some cute pictures, finally extracted from my naughty camera.

1. I have had overdue library books. Twice.

2. I do not have a perfectly clean house every day. Or almost any day. Sue me. 3. I care more about overdue library books than a clean house.

4. If you notice my daughter's "milk" moustache in these pictures to be especially prominent, it is because it is not milk. Three guesses as to what it is(it's nothing gross.)
5. I sometimes get in a bad mood when things do not go my way. Or when I don't feel good. Or like a whole week out of each month when I try to pretend I'm not in a bad mood.
6. My kids walk around in their underwear a lot. Hey, it's summer, and Daughter has learned to remove her own clothing so I'm lucky to even have undies on her at all most of the time! Peace and love, not clothing, baby!

7. My picture-taking frequency has gone way down because of #6, so I have noticed a big drop in the quantity of pictures, but I will try to improve the quality of them...the confession part is that I really have no patience to learn how to properly use my camera. When I push the button, it should take a perfect picture every time, right? Why does it not come out right?8. I don't like losing or not being good at something. I will avoid an activity I know I will not win or I am not good at. Or if forced to play, I will intentionally not try just so I won't have to feel bad about losing. I know, I am a poor sport.

9. I am not an animal lover. I like the abstract concept of them, but I don't like cleaning up after them(but seriously, does anyone?) This was a huge blow to my animal-loving husband.

10. I think I am OCD. I think that is why I can't get my house clean, because I go waaaaaay overboard on each tiny detail and forget about the bigger picture until I have run out of time and energy. I even had to think extra hard to stretch out the last few confessions to have a nice even number ten for you...like you care if there are 9 or 10.

So if I have nothing nice(and positive) to say(blog,) I blog nothing at all. Of course, that is not the only reason you may see a gap in posts. Sometimes I am busy, others I simply have no thoughts worth sharing, but sometimes I just don't have the positivity in me that day. And that is okay. All will be right with the world after a nice long nap.

One of My Jobs

2009-07-23T07:15:00.004-07:00

was on the news. A few months ago, but I have just learned about it, and I am excited about it. And grateful. I just watched this news clip about Premier. It showed our jewelry ON TV!! Ok, I need to focus here. I meant to write a serious post, thankfulness for this job, not gushing over how I have that very necklace they showed on TV(even though I do!) A new catalogue coming out, and now THIS!!! Ahem...

Four score and Three years ago, our forefathers......too serious? Let me try again...

Three years ago I signed up with this company and have not regretted it one minute. I made my investment back quickly and have made so much more than money. I have made friends of my hostesses, made them and their friends feel pretty and laugh for the night, given them thousands of dollars in free jewelry to make them feel pretty for a very long time(and their husbands' wallets feel happy.) I have made lasting friendships with my fellow jewelers and Premier mom, Jenn, who calls me to talk about nothing at all or to see how I am doing. These women, in the real world, would be my competition. But in the Premier world, they are my friends and encouragers. They cheer for me and care about me as a person and as a jeweler. And I care about them long after they move away or no longer sell the "jewels," as we affectionately call them.

My darling husband encouraged me to sign up and had faith that I could do this. I thought that I would be a terrible salesperson, as I am not "pushy" or "sales-y" by nature, but instead of the typical husband response of "whatever you want, dear" he told me, " I think you should do it!" What a man. I know. I think he knew I would not have had the confidence to try if he had not had the confidence for me. He has watched the kids for almost every show I have done, and encouraged me to go to trainings, attended them when men were "allowed" and has always been just the right amount of supportive.

The biggest gift I have received from my business has not been the Christmas gifts it has paid for or the free jewelry certificates they thrill me with from time to time. I have changed. I cannot even describe the miracle that has happened, but I will try. I have worked for three years, and I have discovered a confidence in myself as a person and a woman that I did not have before. That is the reason I was able to look inside myself and think about what I really wanted to do with my life...and have the confidence to think that I could do it. I will fall, but it is the picking myself back up that gives me strength. It has made me a better wife and mother, and a better person.

I have neglected to talk about my jewelry here for fear of seeming pushy, but this is my blog, and my thoughts are here, so today, you read about jewelry. Want some for free? Now you know someone...

Twitter

2009-07-20T13:22:00.003-07:00

Apparently, I am doing quite the trendy thing. Between Facebook and my beloved blogs, I am with the "in crowd" these days. {shudder} I hate to be trendy. But my darling husband has been asking me why I do not Twitter also. I have a sneaking suspicion he is being a tiny bit sarcastic, as he just might want something to tease me about. But I looked into it. Apparently, Twitter is huge right now. Like, totally trendy, which totally repels me. Strike One. All the celebs are doing it on their Blackberries...strike two. You are limited to 140 characters??? All right.. that does it. I am sorry, I know you all will be hugely disappointed but if you remember from a certain earlier post I wrote about texting, that is just not enough room for me. As much as you wanted to be continually updated on the minute to minute excitement that is my life, I can't fit it into 140 characters. And it is trendy. eew. I have to invest my energy into less trendy and more constructive endeavors...but hark!
I hear from the other room the "Ohhhhhhhh!" sound in unison from my children. Do you know what that means? Oh, yeah, Spongebob is on and they are not napping. So the blogging break is over. See you later, trendy friend.

Flexibility

2009-07-16T21:15:00.005-07:00

Sometimes life throws you a curveball. Sometimes you strike out. We all have those bad days or days when we struggle to regain our perspective.

One thing I have learned is that I need to learn to trust outside myself. I like to be in control of my surroundings, every detail immaculately planned and executed according to the plans made well in advance. But, the best laid plans will sometimes go awry. I live in the world and I have children. That should explain it.

So my children are teaching me a lesson that I have never before learned. I have to be flexible and learn to take life as it comes. I have recently learned that not everything in life is divided down the lines of right and wrong, as in the right way to do things(my way) versus the wrong way to do them(someone else's idea.) It is okay to have preferences, or to have something work a little better than something else, but it is also okay if someone doesn't butter their toast the "right" way. That is just how I prefer to do it(back when I ate toast with butter, that is.) A true but very simplified example.

I have made many plans in my life, in my motherhood specifically, on the "right" way I wanted to raise my kids. But somewhere along the line I realized that if I stick too stubbornly to the "right" way, I would be ignoring my kids' needs and what made them happy. So I am trying to focus first on their happiness, then making the plans afterward, instead of the other way around. And sometimes as a mom, you have to know when to just let go and have fun.

The trouble I have with this is my thinking. Someone I heard speak once said to "Quit your stinkin' thinkin'!" I believe that is impossible for me. Believe me, I have tried. But what I can do is plan to be flexible. If I have plans A, B, C-M, and so on, then I can have the appearance of being flexible for other people's sakes and still feel in control for my own sake. Because if plans A-L don't work out, I know plan M will come through. And if not, I can make up plan N at a moment's notice. I just have to plan for it.

P.S. I apologize for the lack of pictures of late, but it is due to some technical difficulties and I promise to be back soon with some good ones. Meaning, I will give the camera to L.

Where has the Summer gone already?

2009-07-13T09:38:00.001-07:00

How the summer has flown. July is officially going on my calendar every year as a crazy month.
It is now just days until school starts again. There are school supply displays in every store. My dear boy is going into the first year of real school. Where did the time go? And where is his classroom? Who is his teacher? What time does school get out? So many questions...I feel like a kid lost on the first day of school myself, so many unknowns. But silly, because all too soon all these questions will have answers and we be in the thick of it before I blink again. I had better cut open a watermelon and enjoy what is left of this summer while it is still here. I hope you do too.

The decision has been made...I think.

2009-07-12T06:21:00.004-07:00

Thanks for all your votes. By the way, option #4 was a trick question, nobody was actually supposed to admit they don't think I will ever grow up. But you are safe in the anonymity that is the internet, so don't worry. I think I have decided where my heart lies for a future career. But it is a secret because I have yet to figure out exactly what it will take to accomplish this lofty goal. So thank you for your votes, but ultimately, it is all up to me. No pressure or anything. Seeing as how I am possibly the most indecisive person alive, I may see "what it takes" and decide that it's not for me either. So when I know for sure the whens and hows, I will keep you posted. And I am sure you will all lie in bed awake at night wondering just WHAT it could possibly be that J has decided to do with her life. Please, do not lose any sleep, if you are that curious, you can email me and I will tell you my tentative Plan For My Future Career. Just keep it quiet so I don't lose face if I change my mind. Again.

Dear Husband

2009-07-09T07:36:00.003-07:00

I was thinking about my sweet husband this morning after he left. He looked very handsome and toned in the outfit he chose to wear. His pants are like an inside secret between the two of us, history that we have. It makes me smile to see him wear them.

I hope he enjoyed the dinner I made especially for him last night. It is a bit of a challenge to cook healthy and delicious meals at the same time, but I try.

I listened to him breathe last night as we lay in bed. I usually fall asleep quickly, but for some reason it took me a little while and I got to hear the sweet sounds of his breath deepening as he finally got to relax for the day. I was grateful to hear it because I worry if he is getting enough rest, as hard as he works and as late as he stays up studying sometimes.

I love him so much it is hard to be a burden on him sometimes when I do not feel well. I just want to be nothing but sweetness and light, an angel who is always radiant and patient, beautiful even in the pain of childbirth, smiling as I push out his cherubs into the world. Unfortunately, I am but a lowly human and that means sickness with the health, poor times with the rich, bad times along with the good. But somehow, when you are with that perfect person, even the worst of times are still good times. So I'll take the dirt, sweat, blood, pain, and tears, as long as he comes with it.

Sweet Child(s) O' Mine

2009-07-02T10:53:00.003-07:00

Welcome Home, my dear ones. I have missed you so. I know it has not been that long, and I hope you had a good time, but know that your mother has suffered without you. Body and soul. I hope to be on the road upwards now. I look forward to seeing your two smiling faces as you call out, "Mommy!" and run into my waiting arms. Then maybe I can feel complete again.

Spiderman

2009-06-27T09:02:00.004-07:00

We are friends with Spiderman, didn't you know?

Just kidding...he came to town to talk about being a "Buddy, not a Bully" in April, I think, for Child Abuse Prevention Month. I have neglected writing this post since then because it is a very touchy subject. There were many parents who seemed a little put off by Spidey talking about very sensitive subjects such as abuse and what to do. Of course dealing with bullies their own age is tough, but the lines there are more clear cut than abuse by a trusted adult. I think Spidey did a great job explaining to kids about physical, emotional and sexual abuse, but he only opened the door for an ongoing conversation between parents and children.

Spidey says...say "NO...GO...TELL" Simple thing for kids to remember.

I have been spending a lot of time in waiting rooms lately and have read quite a few magazine articles. One thing I read that has really stuck in my head is about kidnapping. It said something like most kidnappings are done by someone the child knows(I am assuming vaguely knows.) What the magazine recommended you teach your child to do is always tell someone they have to ask their mom before they go anywhere, no matter who it is or where. I had this conversation with Son yesterday(after seeing something on tv.) I used myself as an example and said that Mommy and Daddy always let each other know where we are going for safety so we know the other one is ok, he needs to as well. Even if he sees a school friend when we are at the park and they need to go to the bathroom, he should ask Mommy first so that I know where he is and that he is ok. Son is very into superheroes and has been saying things like when he gets older he will fight the strangers and things like that. I am still straightening that one out, but he is aware of the danger of strangers. He has known about not talking to strangers for a long time. I think that part of things is drilled into kids' heads, but how do you teach them not to trust someone they may kind of know? Or think they know well? This scares me so badly that I have to find a way to protect my children. I don't want them scared of everyone and everything, but I don't want them to be victims. So I am going to talk about these ugly things with them in an effort to educate and protect them. Thank goodness I have Spiderman on my side!

Just for you...and a request

2009-06-26T10:41:00.002-07:00

I have been reorganizing lately. My house, my blogs, my life. I need structure. And less clutter. Simpler life=easier to keep up with? Maybe? So now you have categories on both this and my recipe blog to click on. But please don't ask me how long it takes to reorganize. A detail-oriented person such as myself cannot rest until every detail is finished, so it is a painstaking process at times. Hint:Part of my non-New Years Resolution. But now that my crafting buttons are organized by style, color, and size...(just kidding) life can go on.
So now, what was that silly post about the panties? Click "silly" and there you have it. You're welcome.

But now...I have a request. I have been rethinking my goals lately. What should I be when I grow up? I have been thinking about writing a book. My original plan for my life was to marry my Handsome Prince and teach Private Music lessons, so I majored in Music in college. But I don't think I really am destined in my heart to be a teacher. Now I still could teach lessons, but I was thinking about going back to school to be a school psychologist. Then I could still be off summer vacation and holidays with my kids, but don't have to be a teacher. And I would make more money, which is obviously a factor. Or I could become a famous musician. What do you think I should do? I love being a stay at home mom, and am committed to being one until both my children are in school. That is my goal, first and foremost. But I am a planner, and I want to start planning for what I want to be when I grow up, too. Big problem: I am indecisive.

Happy lunchtime...

2009-06-24T12:34:00.003-07:00

Hi Honey,
Hope you're having a great day! I am excited for the plans tonight, I hope you get a chance to relax a bit. Thanks for climbing up on the roof yesterday, I can really feel the difference today. I appreciate you so much and everything you do. It was so nice giggling and teasing with you last night, we should turn in that early more often. Love you more than a cheese sandwich.

Hi, Honey!

2009-06-23T11:53:00.003-07:00

I am a horrible texter. If I have ever sent you a text message, you probably already knew that. Between my run-on sentences, colorful adjectives, and my stubborn refusal to learn the language( b4, 2nite, etc.) my texts usually get broken up into 2 or 3 if I don't catch it first. If I do catch it first, I have to then edit down to 160 characters, which is torture for a detail-loving girl like me. So texters beware....
I like to send an occasional sweet surprise text to my sweet husband wishing him a safe trip to or from work(it's a long one) or just to have a great day as his beautiful and loving, sweet wife pines for him at home. Unfortunately, I have a tendency to wax poetic, and there is only so much I can do with a mere 160 characters. And "I love you" can be as exciting as a cheese sandwich when it is repeated exactly the same day after day after day...(did you see that movie?)
So I know that my husband reads my blog. Some of my posts are geared for him especially to lift him up a little on his lunch break(or so the romantic in me hopes)So this part is for you, Luis: This is what I would send as a text if I wasn't limited by space.
Thanks for being such a hard worker. I missed you this morning when you left exxxtra early, but I know it is for me and the kids that you are working so hard. I am grateful you have a job to go to! You provide so well for us, and all by yourself. That is a very difficult thing to do, especially in this day and age. I look forward to being more of a contributor in that area, but thanks for bringing home the bacon! I can't wait to see you tonight and will cook you whatever you want and spoil you rotten because you deserve it. I think of you constantly and hope you are having a great day! I love you more than a cheese sandwich. The end.
PS I hope you are eating a healthy lunch. The end for real this time.

99 pictures

2009-06-10T05:49:00.007-07:00

Son had his uncle J and cousin B over for a couple nights' sleepover and Son went crazy with the camera the first night. Boys will be boys. I deleted all the ones of the ceiling, the floor, Son's foot, etc. and here are some of the ones I came up with:

That is not my child.
Look, Mom, photographic evidence that J brushed his teeth before bed... And B flossed...

It was a long weekend, but I am, as always, focusing on the positives. Someday I will look back and laugh about the time my bedroom window got broken by a football, but for now...silly pictures. Son loves his dear cousin and uncle so much, as you can tell.

And I am going to heaven for sure... just look at the halo around my head.

Happy Summer!

2009-06-04T09:31:00.006-07:00

Son got a Hulk Slip-n-Slide for Christmas last year. He saw it in the store and was excited, it was on super-duper clearance(being 6 months out of season) so we slipped it under the tree for him. And the waiting commenced.

He has been ever so patient for a hot enough(and not too busy) day to finally set it up.

Today...was the day.

Hello, my name is Daughter. My mother has not yet combed my hair today, but I am still rockin' it for the camera!

Down a peg(or two)

2009-06-02T13:25:00.007-07:00

I love taking my kids to the grocery store.
I usually pack a mini box of raisins, today it was fruit snacks, for them and let them ooh and aah as we shop. We stop to look at the lobsters and say hello on our way...I love it. Today Son lost his fruit snacks by the time we got to the carts. For once the store was not out of the car carts, so we loaded up into a red one and headed oh so patiently back to the car to retrieve them. As we walked I thought smugly to myself what a brave and patient mom I was, what other mom on earth actually looks forward to a trip to the grocery store with their kids? What a nice day....

The fruit snacks were not in the car.

Panic ensued. A search party was assembled. It failed miserably.

Patient still...then the climbing started(the seatbelts on the red car were broken) and the screaming resumed in the middle of the produce aisle while Daddy called on the cell. Great.
Eventually we got settled down enough to get the rest of our list and get to the checkout, where a couple of us came down with a bad case of the octopus grab-hands. This can be deadly, people. Serious. I think one of us gritted her teeth so hard she may have damaged a filling in her effort to maintain composure. The employees felt so sorry for us that they didn't even ask if we wanted help to our car, they just took the cart and went. That, right there, is my instant punishment for patting myself on the back for my mothering skills. By the way, in case you read my slightly smug money post a couple posts ago, I went a little over budget this trip, too. I'm blaming it on the kids. Ah, heck, it's probably my punishment for that post, too. Don't panic, L, it wasn't by much :).

Already? She's Two? But She's So Little...

2009-06-02T07:35:00.006-07:00

I don't consider myself much of a procrastinator, but when there is a huge event and tons of pictures from it to be sorted through, I must confess I did procrastinate this one.

Daughter's birthday party.

I am a big fan of psychoanalyzing myself. I think maybe I was putting this one off because I don't want to acknowledge how old she is getting. Even if she's not getting too much bigger. Or maybe I'm just in denial about being a procrastinator.

She looooves the grape lip gloss. Oh yeah. She had to apply a grape sized amount to her lips and cheek area(or until the pot was empty, whichever came first.)Son helped blow out the candles. Mother Nature did too. She actually helped them be very difficult to light as well.
I made this cake for her with my own two hands. I am not a particularly talented cake decorator, and I don't have the right(or quality) utensils for the job, so it was much more difficult and time consuming than it should have been. But it is important to me that I do these homemade special things for my kids. They can look back and see the slightly imperfect cake that Mommy made, but it was made with love. And I think that was probably the only thing holding this cake together. Love. I don't have much energy these days, making this cake felt like maybe running a marathon, but it was the one special thing I wanted to do for her that I hope she will remember forever. Let's get real, though. She's two. So we took lots of pictures.

Money, Money, Money...

2009-05-31T16:45:00.007-07:00

Do you know that song?

I just tallied up, for funsies, how much I spent on groceries in May. It was about what I thought it should be, not too much. I won't post the actual amount because I haven't asked the boss' permission(wink) and I don't think it's cool to do that without some prior communication. Anyway, I think I am a pretty smart shopper and budgeter and I thought I would share some of my money philosophies for you today.

Grocery Shoppers 101:

-stock up on nonperishables and get them CHEAP. Do not run down to the convenience store for a can of soup, because you will pay $5 for a $.50 can of soup. It adds up.

-If they put a limit on it, it is usually a great bargain and you should get the limit if you can freeze or store it.

-Figure out what you can go generic on(almost everything, trust me!) and find coupons for the name brands you can't live without. (Or stock up when there are sales)

-It is better to go with a huge list twice a month than go twice a list for a couple things. When I only have a couple things to get, I find I am more likely to throw random things in the basket. When I know I have a giant list to get, I am trying to focus on the list and do not make as namy impulse buys.

-When in doubt, look closely at the store price label. It will break down the price to cents per ounce(or unit) for you so you can see which deal is better. The "economy size" doesn't always work out better if the smaller one is on sale.

-the displays in the center of the aisle and the endcaps are not always the best deals. Take the time to go to the home aisle and compare.

-If I have an "I'm in a hurry, I don't care what it costs" attitude, things add up FAST!

General Money Philosophies:

If it ain't broke, don't replace it 'til it is...save up and watch so you know a good deal when you see one. If you fear your dishwasher is on its last legs(as I fear mine is), start watching and acquainting yourself with the brands and prices. Save up a little each week toward your clean dish fund. If you don't prepare yourself, you'll end up having to pay more than you should or not getting the one you really like for lack of funding. Or worse, having to CHARRRRGE IT!!!!!(shudder) If you have two appliances(or more-yikes) nearing retirement, breathe, save, and cross your fingers that they cross over one at a time(or at least, that's what I am currently doing.)

If you really want something, do without forever and ever and ever...(just kidding) but do wait until a birthday or holiday. Or the after Thanksgiving blowout sale. Or the Memorial Day sale. Or 4th of July...you get the picture. There is always a holiday sale coming around. Take the time to price(and brand) compare and wait for the next sale. The few big-ish purchases I regret are because I did not take the time to research them enough.

What else....? I reuse everything I can before I run out to the store. I make things and get creative because I can make something exactly the size and function I want, the things in the store seem to cost so much for what you get. And they just don't seem to fit with the ideas I have in my head. Not only am I recycling, but I am living c.h.e.a.p. See picture...explanation later. This item cost me nothing but my time to make.

(Please excuse the terrible photograpy, L is working today.)

Graduation

2009-05-29T12:36:00.006-07:00

Son graduated preschool last week. His last day wasn't until today, however, so here are the highlights:

One, Two, Buckle My Shoe..........Nine, Ten, A BIG, FAT HEN!!!

That is his diploma...he is looking toward the future with it.....
You are my sunshine, my only sunshine....you are my love shine....you are my star shine.....(picture one beautiful, solitary tear running down my mommy cheek.)

And a picnic today to top it all off.

Son said in the car on the ride home, "Mom, we accidentally brought my pencil box home! We have to return it!" "No, Son," I say. "You aren't going back there." Ever. Again. {sniff} "You are going to be in a new school for kindergarten next year."

And I had to throw in a particularly beautiful picture of my girl. Just for you.

Question of the Day

2009-05-28T11:58:00.005-07:00

Potty training question: how many pairs of panties do you go through a day?

Answer: Some days one, other days this many...

P.S. It's nine, by the way, and they're all dry. And she put them all on herself. Skirt-style. I helped with the last one so her little cheeks would be covered.

Titanic, part one...

2009-05-18T15:21:00.005-07:00

I am a detail oriented person. Very detail oriented. More than anyone else you will probably ever meet. I could make a living proofreading the phonebook if there was good money in it. I'm not kidding. So when I start a project, I have many detailed questions. Many. Detailed. Questions....

I started an "easy" sewing project a long time ago. So long that I refuse to write down how long I have stared at it and wished I could finish it. It started out as a rag quilt, now it is a King size bedspread. I have tripped myself up on every phase of this project. I tend to think of ways to make projects "different" or "better" and usually that just means "compl-i-ca-ted." I asked L to help me and promptly confused the heck out of him. We finally configured the thing to where we "wouldn't hate it for eternity" and it is almost finished. It is now dubbed the Titanic...the no-fail, dummy sewing project that hit many innocent-looking snags that nearly sank it. It now proudly rests on the water(bed) because although I am not done with the "rag" part, it is assembled and we are sleeping with it, darnit! So I will undress my bed daily and work on the ragging part faithfully, and when Titanic sails I will proudly post pictures!

P.S. Too many details?

today...

2009-05-13T12:58:00.005-07:00

Is my anniversary. The official wedding one. We have lots of anniversaries, but when you have been together as long as we have, eventually you stop celebrating all but the biggie. I remember when L and I, accompanied by a tiny baby-food eating Son, went out to eat for the ten-year anniversary of our first date. We went to our favorite restaurant(may it rest in peace) and were seated at a little private table. The waiter so graciously closed the curtains to enclose us in privacy. That was a very special anniversary dinner for me.

I have to tell you something special about my husband. He never forgets a special day. Never. When I get up to go to the bathroom at 12:30am on my birthday, he remembers to say "Happy Birthday!" even though it barely is. So this morning, we woke up to cuddle around 4:30 before he got up to go to work, and the first thing he said to me was "Happy Anniversary." I barely remembered my own name at 4:30am, but he remembered right away that it was a special day. He got up and got all dressed up for our date tonight, since he is picking me up on his way home from work and wouldn't have time to change. (Thanks, sis, by the way, for watching the kiddos.) These are just a couple of tiny reasons why I love him. So much. Like a ton. (sigh of bliss.)

obligatory Mother's Day post

2009-05-11T14:16:00.006-07:00

Happy Mother's Day, everyone!

Ok, got that out of the way...

The best gift I got for Mother's day was a couple hours when both kids napped and I had some time to spend with my husband during the day, just the two of us. We usually don't see each other in the daylight hours, and when we do, it seems we are always rushing here or there, having things to do. But for this one day, we spent it just together. No honey-do, no chores, just time together. Bliss. To top it off, he got me some sweet and thoughtful gifts.

Oh, and I can't forget to mention my kids' gifts. Son worked really hard at preschool to make a bouquet of flowers that will never die, and a recycled vase to hold them in(see picture above.) Daughter gave me a gift no money could buy: a whole day accident free! Clean, dry panties all day are more than a laundry-hating mom could ask for.

Here is my Mother's Day vow: I promise to be one deep breath more patient each day. I promise to remember that my kids are four and(almost) 2 and allow them to be the ages they are. I promise to teach with just enough words to fit their attention span, and just enough information to last them until they get older. I promise to forgive quickly, hug quickly and anger(more) slowly. I can't promise not to make mistakes, but I will promise to ask forgiveness from my children when I do. I promise to laugh, love and be the best mom I can be.
Because I can't be anyone else. And wouldn't want to be.

potty training and life

2009-04-27T16:08:00.008-07:00

Potty Training as a Metaphor for Life:

1. Go hard or Go Home: You cannot potty train if both you and your child are not ready. If your child is ready, but you are not able to commit, it won't happen. If you are ready, but your child is not, it won't happen. Just like in life, if you are not really committed, you will end up with a mess on your hands.

2. My Way or the Highway: Even at the tender age of 18 mos, children have a preference. I picked out potty chairs for both of my children, then had to go back again when they did not like the first one. Daughter has decided she wants to go on the big potty with a little seat attached instead of her own chair. My job as her mother is to recognize things like that and to accomodate them whenever possible. Son wanted to pee standing up. Try as I might, I could not get him to sit down to pee. Once I quit trying to make him do it my way, he had success. It was a couple of months before I could get him to sit down for #2, but he had pee down pat by then. So I guess it is not really "my" way, unless you are thinking from the kids' perspective.

3. Find the Fun in Life: If it is something that is exciting and fun, they will do it gladly. I let both of my kids pick out their undies and got them super excited to go. We had potty chairs ready in the bathroom for a while while we talked about how neat it will be when they get to go on the potty. For my kids, at least, if they feel pressure, they resist against it. As much as I dread doing certain things in life, if I make a challenge or contest for myself, with a prize at the end, any task becomes fun.

4. Accidents happen: They are a part of life and certainly part of potty training. Have plenty of back up undies, as well as a mop handy for messes, but avoid making a big deal out of it. It took some convincing to get Son to quit gagging every time Daughter had an accident. There is another well known saying in life that fits here: s*&@ happens(use your imagination, it applies to both scenarios.)
5. Don't Procrastinate: if you do, you will end up cleaning up a giant mess that would have been avoided had you taken care of it five minutes earlier. Trust me, don't wait for the next commercial break. That is what TiVo is for.
I have been spending a lot of time in the bathroom lately keeping my girl company, and it may have addled my brain, but it seems to me that so many challenges in life can be conquered using the same concepts as when we first learn these basic skills. It is really hard to figure things out at first, but when you get the hang of it, it becomes like second nature. Just be sure to heed Nature's call.

The difference between boys and girls

2009-04-23T08:15:00.006-07:00

I never had a Barbie corvette when I was a girl. So I would raid my mom's closet for the highest heels I could find. Those were my Barbie corvette. And let me tell you, Barbie was looking HOT in her new car! Now I find Daughter already raiding my closet for MY hottest heels. And her mommy loves stillettos. She puts them on and walks around just like mommy. Her feet are so tiny they fit in the level part of the shoe, so she is really quite stable in them. Consequently, I am always picking up scattered heels from every corner of the house.

This morning Son ran by the kitchen, where I was doing dishes, with a black stilleto in his hand. I stopped him and asked if he would please put it back in my closet. He said, "Okay, Mom, but your shoe looks like a gun!"

And that, my friends, is the difference between boys and girls.

Bubba and Sister

2009-04-08T14:09:00.004-07:00

It is a beautiful thing to see the adoration grow between brother and sister. When Sister wakes up from her nap, Brother runs to be the first to greet her. He has figured out a way to get her out of her crib safely. The first time he did it I was a bit freaked out, then I stood in the doorway the next few times to see how he did it. Now I think I can trust him to be careful with her. I can't really describe it, but he manages to lower her all the way down without dropping her. And Sister just thinks he is the bee's knees(although I really am not sure where that expression came from.) When Son blows bubbles in his milk, Daughter has to blow bubbles also. When Son runs around like a wild man, Daughter runs right behind him as fast as her size 4 baby feet will carry her.
The shirt Daughter is wearing in the picture belongs to her brother. I have not had this shirt on a hanger in at least a month. It comes out of the dryer, and as Daughter is usually helping fold clothes, she snatches it and tries to rip off the shirt currently on her back as she says "shirt off." Then I ask her if she wants to wear her Brother's shirt, and I hear "no Bubba's shirt...mine!" So I put it on her. Then it hits the dirty clothes hamper at the end of the day. And repeat.
Son equally adores his sister. Whenever he sees a girly toy on tv, in the store, etc. he always wants to get it for his sister. He knows how to work the DVR. Several times a day I hear, "Do you want to watch Wow Wow, Sister?" (her fav. show which he looks for the w's to identify. Blows. My. Mind.)
When Daughter goes potty, she gets a princess sticker to put on her chart on the wall. She is so proud of herself! She yells "Gook, Bubba, sticka!" She wants to make sure he knows about her big accomplishment. I thought I'd share one thing I have come up with to(hopefully) nurture a positive relationship between them. Son often accidentally hurts her...knocks her over, runs over her, throws a ball too hard, slams her finger in the door. You get the picture. When he hurts her, I have him pick her up and hug her and make sure she is ok. I have noticed that sometimes "I'm Sorry" is so easy to throw out without showing true concern for the other person. So I have him follow through and hug her and comfort her until she feels better. Daughter has started to do the same thing on her own. If she does something that makes you say "ow" she will immediately hug you and say "Tarry, Tarry" until you say that it is ok. I hope that showing love and true concern for each other will continue to be a habit in all their relationships.

Finally, a new post!

2009-04-02T07:05:00.008-07:00

As you may have noticed, I have neglected to post for quite some time. It is not that I have nothing to say, but I just prefer to have most of my posts accompanied by a visual aid. I have not gotten the pics off of my camera in a shamefully long time. I had a little memory card scare, thought I'd lost them all, but thankfully recovered them. So I won't overload you with pictures all at once, I thought I'd draw them out to make it interesting.

Motherhood is hard. Don't get me wrong, I love it. I love being with my children and my life at home. But I constantly worry if I am doing it right. I took a class called Developmental Psychology a few years ago. I remember being so glad I took it before I had kids because NOW I understand what makes them tick. HA. HA. Don't get me wrong, it did help. But my children are extensions of me. Which makes them very unusually complicated. And crazy smart. So smart they scare me sometimes. I have to closely supervise their every move.

I have often wondered why it seems to be so much harder for me to keep things tidy than everyone else on the planet. I have two theories:
1. I am not Martha Stewart. I would prefer to have fun with my kids and cook gourmet-ish meals than clean all day. I try, but it seems to be spectacularly hard for me to simultaneously have the entire house perfectly clean at once. Is this just a myth? Is it even possible?
2. My kids are too smart. I will emerge from a perfectly clean room to discover permanent marker on the wall in the next. Or pink craft paint on the carpet(both true stories.) So I am not giving up, of course, but I just wonder if it is like this for everyone. One friend told me she gets time to clean if she puts on a favorite cartoon to keep them occupied. Really? I get about 5-10 minutes before I get nervous.

I love my children more than life itself. I love being their mother. Really. But being a stay-at-home mother seems to be a job the rest of the world does not take seriously. I don't know about the rest of them, but I have never seen Oprah. I don't watch soap operas. Sometimes I get time to watch whatever is recorded during naptime, but my point is that it is a very busy day every day making sure the kids are safe, happy, clean-ish, fed, and properly nurtured in their psychological growth.

So I just wanted, as a prelude to my next paragraph, and picture, to give a picture of the stay-at-home-hood as I see it. It is sometimes a thankless job for which you receive no monetary compensation, but L and I chose this sacrifice as what we thought would be the best way we could raise our children. And I still believe that. Some people devalue what we do as stay at home moms. I just wanted to emphasize what an important and difficult job it is.

So lately I have been a bit concerned for my oldest child. Is he getting the proper attention since we had his little sis? He was the center of the entire planet for 3 years, no kidding. And while he still is, he has to share the spotlight(and mom's lap) so I wanted to make sure he had some special alone time with mom while his sister takes naps. I found this cute little project on clearance, it cost $2.50, I think, but was several days' worth of quality time with my boy. You learn so much about your child when you watch them work on a project. He is my little perfectionist in the making(sorry, kid.) He does not like to accept help(again, sorry, got it from me.) He wants to do things juuuuust right and gets frustrated when he can't make his hands do what he imagines(again, sorry.) But I got the chance to really encourage him and tell him what a great job he was doing. I secretly hoped that this would make a memory that would last forever for him. It feels good to have someone praise you, even if your project doesn't turn out exactly like you wanted. And it is so important to have unconditional love and acceptance. And I didn't say a word about getting paint on his clothes.

I have seen some old-school parents from past generations who want their kids to be so perfect that they end up constantly picking at them. What they don't realize is that is a very bad habit to start. It damages the child's self esteem for a lifetime. When the child grows into an adult, the parent still has that habit and is very critical of their every move. It is damaging not only to the child's psyche, but the relationship with the parent as well. I am not pointing any fingers here, and I am definitely not referring to my parents. They have very gracefully transitioned into my adulthood and being supportive of my decisions, etc. Just thought that was important to note. I am just trying to be very aware of my own perfectionism, and not expecting it out of my children. I try to give them verbal encouragement whenever possible. Not even I can live up to my own perfectionism, much less a four-year-old. So when he 'accidentally' cuts a hole in his inflatable ball pit, I play the realistic comforter role. "I am sorry that happened, but maybe you can learn a very important lesson about taking care of your things." Oh, goodness, am I doing this right?

*perfectionist alert* I found a typo and could not let it go uncorrected...

Are You Lonesome Tonight?

2009-03-10T19:58:00.005-07:00

I am. L is out of town for a meeting. I put the kids to bed and the silence is deafening. It makes the ringing in my ears very loud. I just can't get that Elvis song out of my head, so I'll post the lyrics. See if you can read them without hearing his voice in your head. I was going to put it in my playlist, but that would be cheating.

Are you lonesome tonight,
Do you miss me tonight?
Are you sorry we drifted apart?
Does your memory stray to a brighter sunny day
When I kissed you and called you sweetheart?
Do the chairs in your parlor seem empty and bare?
Do you gaze at your doorstep and picture me there?
Is your heart filled with pain, shall I come back again?
Tell me dear, are you lonesome tonight?
I wonder if you're lonesome tonight
You know someone said that the worlds a stage
And each must play a part.
Fate had me playing in love you as my sweet heart.
Act one was when we met, I loved you at first glance
You read your line so cleverly and never missed a cue
Then came act two, you seemed to change and you acted strange
And why I'll never know.
Honey, you lied when you said you loved me
And I had no cause to doubt you.
But I'd rather go on hearing your lies
Than go on living without you.
Now the stage is bare and I'm standing there
With emptiness all around
And if you won't come back to me
Then make them bring the curtain down.
Is your heart filled with pain, shall I come back again?
Tell me dear, are you lonesome tonight?

Makes me want to pick up my guitar(and fake it, I'm still a beginner.)

By the by, has anyone seen "The Baxter?" I caught it the other day on IFC. I think I'm a Baxter. (Someone please contradict me!) If you don't know what I'm talking about, I am too embarrassed to explain why I think I might be a Baxter, I'd rather you watched the movie.

Once There was a Girl...

2009-02-24T10:53:00.003-07:00

...who was wandering through her life, willy-nilly as the wind blew her. She was insecure and indecisive and made her choices as she was thrown into them by circumstance. If a boy liked her, she liked him back(for a minute, then threw him back.) If something came easy to her, she did it. If something was difficult, she didn't. She was beautiful, but didn't know it. She was intelligent and talented, but she didn't think so. She had a few friends, but didn't feel like anyone really cared about her or understood her...

Then there was a boy. He was a fighter. When he saw something he wanted, he fought for it. If there was something he cared about, he would never give up until he was the best, and even then he would not stop. He was very handsome and charismatic, everyone wanted to be around him. He was easy to get to know, but hard to know well. He had friends by the hundreds, but still, he needed something...

Then one day the boy saw a picture of the girl. He saw something in her. He knew she was destined to be his. And he was destined to belong to her. He met the girl, but the wind blew her in another direction. He was undaunted, and chased the windblown girl until she saw him. Really saw him. Then the girl saw in his eyes what he had already seen in hers...and they never parted.

The Beginning.

Happy Hearts

2009-02-18T10:56:00.006-07:00

My sweetheart and I went to a V-day banquet last weekend. We ate yummy catered Mexican food, something our dieting palates have not had for a very long time. There was a fun "Not-so-Newlywed" game, an Elvis impersonator(young skinny Elvis, he did a hilarious impression.) And I graced the lucky room with a few performances as well. I always forget until after the fact that maybe I should have invited my sweet mama to come see me the last few times I have solo'd, since she is responsible for my educational beginnings.
Sorry, Mom.
I just thought I would share some of the thoughts that ran through my head at the time.

Grateful that...
-my full tummy did not get in the way of my pitch.
-I did not cry, as has happened a few times when I put too much emo. in it.
Likewise, my voice didn't break.
-they had a mic so I did not have to yell it
-standing O=blushing but happy J

Happy that...
-I could just see the giant proud smile on my date's face as I imagined his
shaking knees (he does this when he is nervous or happy.) He was
nervous for me, since I don't really get nervous, old pro that I am and all.
- I closed my eyes and just let it go. All for him, I did not let him hear me
practice so it would be a surprise which songs I did and how I did them.
- he was there to see me, he has missed the last few times I'd solo'd.
It was a special night for me, and I loved sharing it with the one I love the most.
I hope you had a happy and romantic Valentine's day with your sweethearts, too.

P.S. The three songs I sang are included in my playlist to the right...care to guess which ones?

Snow Day!!

2009-02-10T10:31:00.006-07:00

Look what we woke up to this morning:

Snow!!

Son has played in a tiny bit of snow before, I think twice in his young life. But this year he has been asking about it a lot, "Why don't we have snow? I want to play in the snow." He doesn't remember ever being in the snow before. I promised him that if the mountains get snow, I will take him to play in it before winter is over. But it looks like the man upstairs heard the pleas of a little boy, because he was "so incided" this morning when he woke up to white stuff everywhere he looked.

Daughter is saying a new word today: "Hat" Exciting, I know. She has been very intentional about new words she learns these days. She enunciates so carefully..."Boookk" "HHaatt" to make sure she says it just right! She is a hoot!I bundled the kids up ever so carefully in their scarves, hats, mittens, but neglected to plan so well for myself, so we made a mini-snowman. If I had tried to make a full-sized snowman, I fear it would have been at the expense of a frostbitten finger or two. So here he is: carrot nose, raisin eyes in all his momentary winter glory. Son wanted to have a snowball fight, and as I bent over to roll a snowball, he hit me with the first one. He aimed perfectly, and I got snow up the back of my shirt and down the back of my pants...CCCCCCCCCCOLD! I was already half frozen, so before we went inside, I made a snow angel. Son had the idea first, laid down in the snow and got right back up, saying "I don't like that idea anymore." Yeah...cold!

Then, just as we got inside and peeled off our cold wet layers, we got one more happy surprise: Daddy! He had gone into work just to find out that they closed down for today, so he got a snow day too!! We love our Daddy so much and it is not often he gets to stay home with us in the middle of the week! And even better, we can't go anywhere because of the snow! So we are bundling up beside the fire and staying inside ALL DAY LONG for the first time in a LONG time! Hot Chocolate, extra marshmallows, anyone?
UPDATE: Conversation I just overheard: (PG-13, so beware!)
Daddy: Hey Son, do you have to go pee?
(I'm wondering, is he doing a dance or something?)
Daddy: Do you want to go pee in the snow?
Son: That's disgusting! You aren't supposed to pee in the snow...
(Door closes, I imagine Daddy is teaching his son all there is to know about life, which is: NEVER EAT YELLOW SNOW!)
Have a happy snow day, if you have one, and sorry for you if you don't!

Baby-palooza

2009-01-23T21:23:00.004-07:00

Tonight we had a family movie party. All of us in jammies watching a movie, eating pumpkin muffins, and staying up past(the kids') bedtime. Hey, don't judge me, it's Friday! Daughter was being such a sweet sister, and Son was being so patient. She insisted on sitting on his lap again and again...but then again, she was sharing her Carebears, so he didn't mind.

Then Daughter decided that she wouldn't rest until the entire couch was filled up with dolls. Believe it or not, she still has some left in her room at this point!
She has been struggling with going to bed peacefully in the last couple weeks. Before that, we'd tuck her in and not hear a peep. But she started really fighting it lately. It has been torture for my mommy ears to hear her yelling things like "Mom...Mom...Ow, Ow" and "Water...Water." So tough. But I eventually figured out that she was just saying anything she thought would get me to come into the room and pick her up. Once I figured that out, I had to steel myself not to get up, no matter what she said. If I picked her up, eventually I'd have to put her down again, and you cannot imagine the terrible screams I would hear then. I shudder to even remember.
So tonight, I told her it was time to go to sleep and she immediately began shaking her head no. I told her she could pick out one of her babies to go to bed with her. She had been holding onto the two in the picture above for a while and could not decide between them. So I told her she could bring them both, but only if she did not cry and went to bed happy. I then gave each doll a mini-lecture about how they had to go to bed quietly with no crying, too. Daddy and I kissed the three of them goodnight and tucked them in. And I didn't hear a peep.

Son's Sayings

2009-01-22T09:07:00.005-07:00

I have to share some recent cute quotes from my little man:

Him: How did I get out of your tummy, Mom?
Me: The Dr helped me.
Him: Was there a door in your tummy?

and later in that same conversation:

Him: How did I get big?
Me: I made you.
Him:How did you make me?
Me: God and Daddy helped. (thinking...please God, help me now!)
Him: How did they help?
Me: We'll talk about that when you are bigger. (Much, much bigger)
Him: I'm big!
Me: Trust me, not big enough.

During a two-kid bath, we had a conversation about bath safety.
Me: You can't knock Sister down in the bath. You have to be very careful with her. If she goes under the water, she could drown.
Him: And she would die?
Me: She could...or she could get hurt. We love her and don't want her to get hurt.
then a few minutes later...
Him:I love you, my baby. I don't want you to die.

So many questions, but the answers are dwindling(at least the ones I can tell him now.)

That's All I Know

2009-01-21T16:06:00.005-07:00

I bruise you.
You bruise me.
We both bruise too easily,
too easily to let it show.
I love you and that's all I know.
All my plans
Have fallen through
All my plans depend on you
Depend on you to help them grow.
I love you and that's all I know.
When the singer's gone
Let the song go on...
But the ending always comes at last
Endings always come too fast.
They come too fast
But they pass too slow.
I love you and that's all I know.
When the singer's gone
Let the song go on...
It's a fine line between the darkness and the dawn.
They say in the darkest night, there's a light beyond
But the ending always comes at last
Endings always come too fast
They come too fast
But they pass too slow.
I love you and that's all I know.
That's all I know.

Do you remember this song? It is so poignant, so simply sung, I can't describe it's beauty. But I thought I'd share the lyrics with you today. They say we hurt the ones we love the most, things do not always go the way we planned, but I love you...and that's all I know.

Once Upon a Time...

2009-01-13T13:10:00.005-07:00

there was a beautiful little toddler, we'll call her Baughter*. She was precocious and too smart for her own good. One day Baught(for short) went to her closest Auntie, Bessica's house. Bessica had moved to a new house just the day before. Baught and her mommy were going to help Auntie Bessica unpack and get settled in her new house. As Baught's mommy filled a closet with blankets and Auntie took a shower, Baught went into her cousin's room, shut the door and locked it. Baught's mommy realized what Baught had done just a moment later and tried the doorknob. To her surprise, it would not turn. Supposing it to be a run-of-the-mill household doorknob, mommy went to get a butterknife or screwdriver to open it. When she leaned in to insert the screwdriver she had found, she discovered that it was no ordinary doorknob. It was a special security doorknob that required a special key to open it. There were no screws or hinges that could be removed to open it. Her first reaction was to laugh in disbelief, as Baught had never locked a door before, and had just the night before learned how to use a doorknob. Mommy peeked her head into the bathroom where Auntie was showering.
"Ummm, Bess? Do you happen to have a key for that door..."
"Oh, (fill in the blank) no! I don't!"
Mommy could not do anything but laugh at the absurdness of it all, even as Auntie started to panic. Mommy hoped she could get Baught to figure out what she had done and how she had done it, maybe this uncommonly brilliant child could be led to understand. Baught understood that there was a problem, but not how it was caused or how to fix it.
"Mommy?" then "Uh-Oh." was heard as Mommy knocked on the door and rattled the doorknob. Mommy tried poking various objects into the doorknob hopelessly. She never had acquired the skill necessary to pick a lock. She went outside to the window, but dared not attempt to remove the screen of Auntie's new house for fear of breaking it. So she waited, just a moment, for poor Auntie to rush out of the shower and find her tennis shoes. Mommy and Auntie wrenched the innocent screen out of the window, but alas, the window was locked. Mommy called Baught's Daddy, hoping not to panic him, but hoping he could give some brilliant advice as to what to do next. Daddy had picked a lock or two in his lifetime, and gave some clues to help, still Mommy had no luck. Auntie called her leasing agent, Rad, to see what he could do. In the meantime, Baught was still calling, "Mommy?" and getting increasingly agitated. Finally! Mommy had an idea! Mommy ran to the kitchen to retrieve....candy. Mommy and Auntie took turns talking to Baught and shoving Smarties and other small candies under the door to distract Baught. Mommy and Auntie feared that if Baught started crying, they would have to kick the door down with superhuman Mommy and Auntie powers. It worked, Baught quieted down long enough for Rad to arrive. Rad brought an arsenal of small tool with him and settled down to work on the door. They heard another "Uh-Oh" as Rad began to bang on the door frame. He said, "She's all right, I hear the candy wrappers rattling." That did it. The absurdity of the situation hit and Mommy and Auntie could not help but giggle, picturing Baught tearing into candy wrappers. Rad had to remove part of the door trim, but was able to hit the catch and open the door to a red-faced, very confused, candy-toting Baught, who finally burst into tears at the sight of the stranger who'd freed her. Mommy picked up Baught and soothed her as Auntie fed her chocolate kisses by the hundreds. Mommy felt sorry for Auntie, who felt sorry for Baught. All was right in the world again, until it was time to go. Then Mommy accidentally hit Baught in the face with the front door, knocking her down. Then she really cried.
The End

*Although this was a true story, names have been changed to protect the, um, innocent.

Goodbye '08 Hello '09!

2009-01-06T13:46:00.009-07:00

I have sadly neglected emptying the pictures from my camera for a long while, so here is my abbreviated attempt to share the most recent cuteness that crossed its lens. I will try not to go too long, but be warned(if you didn't already know) that it is probably not going to happen! I have a feeling that right now my words are only making sense in my head, so I apologize in advance for any gibberish. Anyhoo...this is my favorite picture, taken by the talented photog in the family otherwise known as Daddy. You can see a distinct difference between the snaps I take and the ones he does, mine are blurry and his are focused!
Here are the first and second runners up(as close as my kids will ever get to a beauty contest, I know they would win but I am against the concept!)

Now here for some that I took of Son's school Christmas program...see the difference?

I have a hard time admitting that I might not be good at something, but photography is definitely not my calling in life! I think my calling might be something closer to run-on sentences...
I do not, as a general rule, make New Year's resolutions. I have a hard time thinking of goals for myself. They are always way too hard or way too easy, never reasonably attainable. I feel like most New Year's resolutions are just promises begging to be broken. Unless, of course, you are my inhumanly self-control possessing husband, who gave up soda last January and made it all year without a sip(and several pounds lighter and healthier.) So, although I am not making an official New Year's resolution, I am adopting a motto for this year: a place for everything, and everything in its place. If I can't find a place for things to be put away properly, I have too much stuff and it's time to get rid of it(or have hubby build new shelves)(or quit being such a cheapskate and invest in some.)
We were walking through Walmart the other day and noticed that every aisle and end display advertised exercise equipment and gadgets. We just laughed, because the smart people at Walmart know what many many people have made for their New Year's resolutions this year(and every year?): Get in shape/lose weight. Let me share a little secret with you that L and I learned the hard way: there is no miracle diet/drug/gadget that will magically drop the pounds off. None. None. None. There are things that can help, but here is how you lose weight: Burn more calories than you take in. That means many different things to many different people, but that is the secret. For L, he works out a lot, and so has quite a bit more leeway in his diet than I do. I am quite limited as to my physical activity right now, so the way I lost my weight was to very carefully watch what I ate. We unofficially followed weight watchers, that helped us to pinpoint where we were going wrong. I am far from finished, but now I know what it takes and it is doable. I love sweets, especially that one miserable week out of the month. I just have to say no sometimes, and recognize when it is ok to say yes(once in a while.) We trimmed down portions and eat a lot more veggies, less starches. Eating healthy can be expensive, but if your portions are smaller that they used to be, I found that we saved money on that end, so it worked out pretty close to what we used to spend on groceries. It just occurred to me that I promised this would be a short post...oops! At least I didn't make it a New Year's resolution!

More Thanks

2008-12-22T14:37:00.010-07:00

L has finished his classes for this semester. That alone is reason enough to jump up and down for joy! He finished with straight A's...even bigger jumps for joy!! I suspect he was even a bit of a teacher's pet...going early to class, working hard, knowing all the answers. He had never enjoyed school when he was younger, but I think he really enjoyed these classes. He has definitely changed in that respect. Being a few years older and wiser helps, but he has been kicking butt at work, studying almost every night of the past 4+ years for his seven(I think, I lost count) certificates in the various fields he needed while working toward his ambitious work-type goals. He developed an almost inhuman drive and persistence, not to mention quite enviable study habits and a lack of need for sleep. So a huge HOORAY for my awesome man and his success!

The New De La Hoya

2008-12-11T07:45:00.006-07:00

Please forgive me, for I fear this post is not exactly in the positive spirit I am trying to keep on my blog. I believe after the terrible defeat De La Hoya suffered the other day, he may soon retire. But never fear, boxing fans, I have spawned his replacement! (Yikes!)
My sweet Son got in a real live fight at preschool yesterday. I am feeling very conflicted about it. He was sent to the office and they told him he would be sent home next time. However, as the teacher was telling me about the incident, she said that she did not blame him for fighting because the other kid had told him he was going to kill his mom(me.) I was terribly saddened at the thought of the fight, but he is a Momma's boy and he was fighting for me, so I couldn't get too angry at him. Son told me the other boy also told Son he would cut Son's head off, and that also appalled me that a preschooler would say those things. I am asking a little advice from you, my wise friends. What should I do about this? Should I do anything? I told him that Mommy and Daddy don't hit people when they get mad, and that is not the way to handle things. I have talked to him about using his words and not letting things that people say get him upset, but I have not really punished him, and I am conflicted as to whether I should punish him or what punishment should be appropriate. So, any advice on that? Please don't judge us!

Good News!

2008-12-09T13:06:00.004-07:00

This weekend I conquered the huge fear of driving I developed nearly a year and a half ago. I would definitely not say it is gone completely, but I overcame it enough to drive to where I needed to go and back with only a little sweaty palm problem. That is pretty huge for me, as it has been a big roadblock for a while now. I don't think I'll ever be as confident as I once was, but I can drive again! That is enough for now.

Thanks

2008-12-02T06:29:00.007-07:00

I know it has been a while since my last post, and I owe you some new news, so I thought I'd start with the thanks I have been giving recently.

1. Grandpa made it out of the Hospital feeling pretty good, he got to go shooting with the boys, which I'm sure was the highlight of his week. I am not so thankful for the little accidental fall I learned about yesterday, but he is still ok, so I am thankful for that.

2. I am thankful for the huge family we are a part of(seen here playing Yahtzee, Daughter got a huge kick out of rolling the dice!)

3. I am thankful that said huge family has evolved so we can be flexible with our holiday plans. The date on the calendar is not what makes a gathering special, it is the people involved. We did not have to eat three turkey dinners, instead having a fun fiesta for one of them! I think this one was Daughter's favorite, she had seconds!

4. I am thankful for this man and the loving husband and father he is.5. I am thankful for this handsome boy:6. Also thankful for this adorably sweet girl. (Seen here hitting up the Vitamin C...it's cold and flu season, you know!)7. Another huge thing I am thankful for is the relationship my kids have with each other. In good times and in bad, sharing candy and a ride on a bike...
...or a time-out that only one of them was given, the other can not bear to let their best friend suffer alone.When one is in pain, the other one cries with them. When one is in trouble, the other one refuses to play(or take their eyes off of them) until time-out is over. Son is an incredibly patient and sharing big brother, and Daughter is the little sister whose big bro can do no wrong.
8. I am thankful to have each of you in my life, and the time we get, however few and far between, to catch up with each other.
9. I am thankful my husband has a job, even as sad as I am that not everyone we know still does.
10. I am thankful for my house, my car that runs, my electricity, water, my heart that is still beating, etc. etc. These are the small little things that on every other year would probably not have made the list. But since this year we are much more aware of some of the things others lack, it make me more grateful for every little thing I have.

Grandpa update

2008-11-20T20:03:00.004-07:00

Just thought I'd give a quick update since I have finally gotten to see Grandpa. My sweet big sis watched the kids the other day, and now L and I went and my mama watched them in the lobby so we could have a quick visit.
Grandpa is doing great. He is making lots of new friends of all the nice young nurses who take care of him. He is directing the phlebotomists as to which veins would be good to try next, then stealing the bands they have wrapped around his arm. He swears he is going to make an entire collection of slingshots when he gets out. As of today, I think he has 8 collected. As he told the poor phlebotomist today as he clutched the rubber band, "I'm keeping this, you're not getting it back!" And all the poor man could say was "ok, um, keep it to remember me by."
Also, somebody owes this man a pizza party! Apparently, they made a deal that when his weight got down to a certain number, he would get a pizza party. He found out what his weight was in Kilos, then had to ask around and finally called me to look up the conversion for him. He had correctly suspected that he was in the pizza party zone. Today after his angioplasty when we came to see him, all he could talk about was that he was supposed to have a pizza party!
L sent him a cap with the county logo on it(he collects hats) and I delivered it the other day when I went. He sent it home with the first person going because he did not want someone to get "sticky fingers" while he was getting his angioplasty. In the meantime, he didn't mind one bit leaving his laptop behind sitting on the table! That really made L feel good.
Anyway, while he still does not know how much longer they are going to keep him, you can take some comfort in knowing that he is staying as positive as I have seen him, and they are taking very good care of him.
Oh, and by the way, in case we were worrying about his lungs all this time, he says that he heard that our lungs are made to last 150 years, and hearts 100 years, so the heart is bound to go bad before the lungs. Of course, since he is as old as the hills, there's no telling when he'll hit 100. I have been praying, not for him to have more time on this earth, but for the time he has to be good time. And so far, it seems my prayers have been answered.

Reminiscing

2008-11-20T19:53:00.003-07:00

So, I just finished reading Twilight. Finally. For the second time(in two days.) And I think I'll reread the good parts before I give it back(tomorrow, I promise!) And I have had an epiphany about why I could not get enough of this book. It reminds me so much of my husband(not the vampire parts, of course!) and our early relationship in high school. He was so mysterious, so intense at times. I have told him for years that is how I can tell when something is wrong...his eyes turn black. We were so wildly attracted to each other it was hard to contain within ourselves. This book brought back a lot of memories for me, I hope all of you can say the same about your significant others. I admire him and love him in so many different ways now, but I had forgotten "the early years" of teenage intensity(and hormones?) I am so glad that I can still have chills and reminisce about my high school sweetheart without making my husband jealous. By the way, he was the Handsome Stranger mentioned a few posts ago...it recently occured to me that not everyone would get that. He just stops in for a short while before heading out on the nights he has classes, so it is fun to pretend. Just thought I'd clear that up...back to the good parts of the book.

Christmas

2008-11-19T10:41:00.005-07:00

This year I have made a decision. Yes, times are tough all over, but I choose not to let that affect my Christmas or my children's lives. Regardless of how much(or little) money we have, we are going to be careful with it. That being said, we are focusing this Christmas, and hopefully every Christmas, on giving.

We are participating in a charity event and shopping for kids in need. This club provides the money and sizes, we do the shopping. It has been very profound for Son that we are shopping for clothes for these children, and that is all they are getting for Christmas, no toys. He got excited over the cute little Tinkerbell shoes we picked out for a little girl and said "How cute are those!" He cracks me up! We are giving our time. That is all it costs us to give ten children a Christmas.

This Christmas I took the two kids shopping to pick out a(less than $10) gift for each other, and that is all they are getting from the store from us. I am going to sew them a pair of homemade PJ's and another project which I will detail if it goes as planned. We are not poor, jobless, homeless, etc. But the gifts I cherish from my childhood are the ones that my Mom and Dad made for me. The time and love put into them have burned them indelibly into my memory. Ask me to name some of the more expensive store-bought gifts they gave me...ummmm? You catch my drift. The more we have, the less we appreciate it. I think because I did not have every single thing I wanted when I wanted it while I was growing up, I learned not to be greedy and to more easily separate wants from needs. At Christmas it is very easy for me to focus on what I am giving, but so hard for me to create a wish list for myself. I think this is a good thing. I am hoping to pass on the giving spirit to my children. I think my parents passed it on to me, and it is important.

Grandpa O

2008-11-18T07:14:00.005-07:00

Top Ten Things Grandpa has taught me:

10. He taught me to be a "worrier" and to take other people's cares as my own. 9. I cannot look at the cover of a western movie or book without thinking of him. 8. I love black licorice(and black jelly beans) because they remind me of him. 7. I love the combination smell of green tic-tacs and Groom 'n Clean, not because they smell good, but because they smell like Grandpa.
6. He doesn't like to have people spend money on him, but he shows such great appreciation for the thought. He taught my mom, who taught me that it is the thought that(really) counts. I remember her getting up and burning eggs on Father's day to bring to him because that is the way she used to cook them for him when she was little. 5.He can grow a fantastic garden out of old recycled bathtubs. 4.He taught me not to waste things, to find a use for everything(or keep it until you do!) Oh, they call that recycling now, don't they? 3.I started weight watchers thanks to his and my Grandma's inspiration and success. 2. He showed me the value of hard work, giving us jobs. Herding cattle, bucking hay...really...tough...jobs. 1. He taught me that even when things get tough, you can have a sense of humor and focus on the future. Even now, the biggest thing on his mind is getting his 4-wheeler fixed so he can cruise around when he gets out. Everyone who talks to him hears a new plan of attack, and I for one am going to do all I can to make his plans work out. By the way, does anyone know anything about ATV's?

Grandpa O Week

2008-11-16T21:21:00.004-07:00

This week, for reasons obvious to those of you who know me, I am going to post about my Grandpa O. I was going to post all at once, but it was going to be way too long. So one day at a time, so to speak.

Top 10 reasons my Grandpa is John Wayne to me:
10. He looks like him(kinda.)
9. He is a polio survivor.
8. He was bucked off a horse when I was young, and landed on his feet.
7. That horse was still his favorite horse.
6. While healing from the knee replacement he had to have as a result of #8, he refused to use crutches or a cane. He managed to break a bolt that was inside his leg, half of it is still in there somewhere.
5. I kid you not, he feels no pain in his arms or hands. He will see blood dripping before he realizes maybe he needs a band-aid(or stitches)
4. He has got an endless supply of old-time cowboy stories. And the cars he used to own. And that broke down or he "wished he hadn't sold."
3. I really don't know how old he is. When we were little and we would ask him, he would just say, "I'm as old as the hills." (That is a true story!)
2. He used to name his cows after everyone he knew, according to their personality and looks. I will not name any names, but if a cow was ornery, he'd name it after someone ornery, and so forth. He used to have a cow he named Maria. He is not fluent in Spanish, but he swore up and down that Maria only understood Spanish. He would call to his cows, then a special Spanish call just for Maria.
1. He used to be a trapper for a living. He would trap coyotes and skin them. He'd tan the hides and sell them. Not PC nowadays, but back then there was no PC. Those who know him really well should recall the pet(two, at one point) that he kept in the old dairy. I won't be too specific here because I am not sure it was legal to keep Ralph as a pet(can't remember the girl's name right now)

I am trying to bring back memories of him for myself, as I have him on my mind a lot right now and can't go see him.

A Couple Hours In the Life of...

2008-11-13T19:55:00.005-07:00

I just had a really busy, but fun and romantic night that I wanted to remember.

5:15: Start cooking dinner.
5:55: A Handsome Stranger comes in looking ever so professional, yet still HOT!
6:00:Eat dinner with Handsome stranger and the kids.
6:30: Handsome Stranger and I feed each other dessert...pumpkin pie.
6:45: Kiss Handsome Stranger as passionately as kids will allow.
6:50: Handsome Stranger leaves.
7:00: Bathtime for two kiddos
7:15: Read a bedtime story with said kiddos.
7:25: Administer allergy medicine and kiss two kiddos goodnight.
7:30: Listen to the ringing in my ears because the house is so quiet.

Sleep tight, sweet children.

Surprise!

2008-11-13T09:44:00.004-07:00

I was doing dishes this morning and had a pleasant surprise...my Dad! He dropped by to deliver some more firewood for us! He is super busy, but managed to find time to do this for us. I am very grateful not just for the wood, but him finding time to come over and bring it to us. Thanks Dad!

Warning: Not for the faint of heart!

2008-11-10T22:19:00.006-07:00

Imagine my delight to wake up to this sight this morning:Aah, a nice warm house! I have to publicly thank my husband for getting up before the sun to make sure we had a beautiful warm house this morning before he left at a quarter 'til dawn. I just want to take a moment to talk to him, so now is where everyone else should stop reading if you don't want TMI.

The word love is so overused, we have to be careful it's not tossed around in the jumble of words that so casually fall out of our mouths each day. We say we love someone, then one minute later we say we love a song or a tv show! But I want to be sure to define it a little more clearly tonight. I love my husband. I could leave it at that, but I need to be a little less timid maybe, to shout it from the rooftop, so to speak. You are the air that I breathe. You are the human I understand the best and the only person who understands me much at all! I tend to talk a lot to say a little(as if you didn't know) and still you listen until I get to the point, long enough to realize I have one. You show such strength outwardly, but I alone get to see all of your gentleness and tenderness. I know that I am the heart beating in your chest as you are the heart beating within mine. You are unafraid to demonstrate your love to me, but I tend to be timid to express it in as many words. I get embarrassed, I make jokes, I get tongue-tied(I know, hard to believe) and maybe I am a little afraid that for all the words in my vast vocabulary, I cannot find adequate words to express the depth of how I feel. You are the most of everything. You are such a generous and incredible lover. I am very timid to talk about it, I know, but please know that it is not because I am unfulfilled, but because I do not want to make anyone else feel bad because I have it so great. You are it for me. You define who I am and what I have become. Everything I do is to measure up to who you know I can be. I know you have had me on a pedestal for many years. I can only hope that I am half the person to everyone else that I am as seen through your eyes. Yet somehow, when I fall off that pedestal, as I often do, you are also the one to help me up and dust me off. I am grateful that I can feel your love so strongly back. I sometimes wonder if maybe it is even too deep for my comprehension. I know that mere words trivialize it, but I recognize the need to express the words I can find. I know I wrote a song for you many years ago, and I have to confess something. It was my first attempt, and musically, I felt it was lacking to express my feelings. I know that you have always cherished it and I love you all the more for it, but I used to think I could write a better one for you. I realized tonight that there isn't a song in the world that would be good enough. I guess I should leave it at that for tonight.

Thanks!

2008-11-10T14:14:00.006-07:00

This is so random, but I have to confess something. I was worried about being late to pick up Son from preschool today. As I turned onto the street where his school was, I may have been doing a bit more than 15, going maybe 17 miles an hour. (Disclaimer: I do not advocate speeding, I am one of the slowest drivers around, but today I must admit, as I was feeling a bit rushed, it was really hard not to.) Then I noticed a police car turn behind me. I glance down at my speedometer and realize I am just a hair above the limit and he has every right to pull me over if he is feeling like a stickler that day. Thankfully, it seems he wasn't, because as I pulled into the parking lot, he kept on cruising. I was not late to pick Son up, but I surely would have been late(not to mention horribly embarrassed) if I had been on the side of the road getting a ticket for speeding in a school zone, which in my opinion is the worst speeding-type offense a mom can commit. So, lesson learned, thank you for not teaching it to me the hard way Mr. Police Officer(sir,) it is better to be almost late than late + speeding ticket.

All A Family

2008-11-05T21:43:00.006-07:00

Four heads are pressed together. One giggle, then another, then another until we are all laughing over nothing. "We are all a family," Son says. We are all piled on top of Daddy's lap for a family hug, as Son could not let Mommy sit on Daddy's lap alone. Of course, you know Daughter wouldn't be left out. So we all snuggled for a minute(hug and wait, as Son calls snuggling) and took turns kissing cheeks, then said goodbye to Daddy as he was off to class and the kids went off to get ready for bed. These moments are priceless, too priceless for a picture. One of those moments that would have been spoiled if I had broken it to get the camera, you know? But still one of the memories that must be documented before it fades. This is our family, and I feel it is complete.

Here they are...

2008-11-03T09:00:00.008-07:00

Daughter as Snow White Ballerina and Son as THE HULK!

I suppose I must explain why Daughter has a made-from-scratch costume and Son does not. I had an entire homemade family costume set in mind for months, but Son just would not commit to it. He kept changing his mind! So dear sweet Grandma found him the Hulk costume, and his torture of indecision was ended. So that left Daughter. I saw a picture online of Cinderella Ballerina that was just too cute, I had to invent a costume for her!

Here she is in her curlers that lasted about 5 seconds after I took these pics:

And here is her end result...

She had a headband, but wouldn't keep it on! You'll just have to picture her without the popcorn ball in her mouth, I could not get her to part with it! On the 30th we went to our traditional Pomerene School Carnival, 5 bucks a family...you can't beat it! We played games...

And went on the spooky Haunted Hayride! It was dark, so Grandma couldn't see what she was taking a picture of until she had taken it, sorry Son!

We had so much fun that we were pretty wiped out for the partyin' the next day! But we got up and Son got to wear his costume to preschool, came home and got ready for some more Halloweenin'! We went to a quick trunk-or-treat, then to Veteran's park for a movie and some games. The best thing about that night was Daughter trying on the Hulk hands and Mask. She did her impression of the Hulk roar(which sounds a bit like my impression of static!) and it was just too funny!

We watched a Halloween movie...

and hung out with about 10,000 of our "neighbors!"

Hope you had a happy Halloween!

Here we go...

2008-10-30T15:04:00.004-07:00

It's that spooky time again! No, not Halloween, I mean the holiday rush around season! It always starts in October for us. 4 birthdays in the fam means lots of cake-and-ice-cream tummyaches. We are celebrating Halloween today AND tomorrow, more tummyaches(and lots of allergies for my poor, poor Son!)
But in the midst of all the busy-ness, I just want to send a shout-out to my dear, sweet husband. (PS...I know you read my blog, L!) He is busy busy busy, super busy right now, but he is trying so hard to keep our family time his number-one priority(I Love you!) It is not easy, sometimes downright impossible, but I guess that happens when you are the super(est) guy around, everybody needs some of your time. I am begrudgedly learning to share him(with work and school) and be an understanding wife. After all, who knows better than I how incredible he is?(maybe his creator?) Anyway, up until this afternoon, I did not think he was going to make it to our half-hour-away Halloween party and be back in time for his class, but he has miraculously worked it out so he can go with us! (I was TOTALLY understanding if he hadn't been able to make it work, being the number-one awesome wife I am, you know! Promise!) We are a pretty good team, if I do say so myself. (Please reference my mother's humility in previous post....sorry mom, I guess I didn't inherit much of it{kidding}) So look out for some super-cute pictures of the next two days of sugar-fueled fun!

Apples and my Mom

2008-10-29T21:29:00.006-07:00

I love my mom, can I just tell you? She is such a wonderful example of selfless giving. She never ever brags, to the point of having too much humility. She has eight kids and still manages to help whenever help is needed, with much personal expense(monetary as well as energy.)

Example #1. My mom went with the kids and I to the apple/pumpkin farm a couple weeks ago for a field trip with Son's preschool class. My mom and I split a 40 pound box of apples, thinking that 20 pounds each was way plenty. Of course, by the next day I had about a dozen apples with tiny Daughter-bites out of them. She was getting into the box, taking one bite out of an apple, then putting it back and getting another one, and so forth. But I digress...

The kids and I went over to my mom's house to make sugar-free apple pie slices and bottle them. We were supposed to do her apples and mine, but she wasn't feeling up to doing all of them, so she worked and basically did all the work for mine, getting almost no "fruits" for her labor. We made a tiny bit of apple butter and I insisted she keep half of it, but other than that, nada.

Example #2. This is a dual example of both my parents. Both of our households have fireplaces as our main source of heat in the winter, so we planned a woodcutting trip together to stock up on wood. Working with more hands makes the work go much faster, and of course spending time together on the mountain is priceless. We went to get the permit for the wood, and could only get one cord(a measurement unit) of wood(we were hoping to split 3 or 4 cords.) My parents gave us ALL of the wood from the trip, since we needed it more than they did. They came and worked and drove their truck and did not get one bit of the wood. My mom and brothers J and B even came and unloaded it for us, since L is in class pretty much all day on Saturdays now.
So there you have it. I could go on and on about all the little things and big that my parents do for us, but I thought I'd just share the two most recently on my mind. These memories are huge for me. And also, I have to tell you one more thing my mom said to me as we were deep in conversation over apples. "...Just in case I never told you, I think you are very talented and beautiful." That is huge for her, if you note in my first sentence how humble my mother is. She still wanted to make sure that even if I never heard her bragging about me, that I knew exactly what she thought of me and how proud she is of me. She has managed to gracefully let me grow into an adult and take my own path without losing my relationship with her or her opinion of me. She still sees me for who I am and values who I have become. And that is incredible to me.

Grandpa Days

2008-10-28T06:08:00.005-07:00

Monday-Thursday are Grandpa days. Grandpa has stopped by on his way home from work nearly every day since Son was born(no exaggeration.) Grandpa nearly always brings a treat for the munchkins(courtesy of Grandma, who packs them in his lunchbox.) Grandpa takes a few minutes every day to ask Son, "How was school?" and to help Daughter eat a banana(or candy, you know that's Grandpa's job.)

Grandpa is the one Son first told when he had to go into time-out in school(Yikes!)

Grandpa helps Daughter learn to take some help(difficult for her right now.)And I get a little window of time that I can start dinner so it is ready before Daddy gets home. Hooray for Grandpa!

Being a mother

2008-10-21T06:41:00.013-07:00

Are we born with that innate nurturing instinct?

Or did God make these kids so darn cute that you can't help but love them?

Maybe a little of both....

Have a happy Mommy day!
Or as Son says, are you going to be "Super Mommy Happy" today? The answer is....YES!

New blog

2008-10-16T07:20:00.003-07:00

Ok, I started another blog for my healthy recipes. Most have the points figured in for weight watchers, but even if you are not following weight watchers and just want a healthy new recipe, try one! Go here.

Dinner tonight...

2008-10-15T22:05:00.005-07:00

Well, I have decided to post recipes for what we have for dinner from time to time, if I make up a new and healthy recipe that's a hit with the fam. Here is what we had tonight:
Curry Chicken over Rice
Steamed Zucchini(from the garden)

Curry Chicken recipe:
nonstick cooking spray
1 teaspoon curry powder
1 medium onion, coarsely diced

1 lb boneless skinless chicken

1 teaspoon garlic salt

1 cup chicken broth

1/8 to 1/4 tsp cayenne pepper, to taste

1 Tablespoon cornstarch

1/4 cup cold water

1. Cut chicken into 1" pieces, set aside. 2. Heat large skillet to medium and spray generously with cooking spray. Add curry powder and stir around a bit, then add onion. Saute onions about 5 minutes, being careful not to burn them, then add chicken. Sprinkle garlic salt over chicken, then brown all sides. Add chicken broth and cayenne pepper. Turn heat down to low and simmer 20 minutes covered. After 20 minutes, remove cover. Stir 1 Tablespoon cornstarch into 1/4 cup COLD water until dissolved, then add to skillet with chicken. Stir and simmer 2 more minutes or until sauce thickens, then serve over rice.

Enjoy! Let me know if you try this and like it! Adding only 1/8 tsp of cayenne makes it a bit less spicy and more kid friendly, 1/4 tsp for a spicier crowd!

What a difference a year makes...

2008-10-15T21:09:00.011-07:00

We got new family pictures back today, and it is incredible how much we have all changed over the past year...here are ones we had taken in November of last year.

And this year...

I think our physical changes are immense, but they reflect an even bigger change on the inside.

Daughter started off as such a chunky baby!

We took these for her birthday in May...

It is so funny, she still is wearing the same size she did a year ago, but she has still changed so much.

Then these are the newest...

And my darling Son...

We got these pictures taken for his birthday...

But he still changed in the last two months!

I just wanted to share with you some thoughts on the last year for my family. It has been a rough one, make no mistake about it. But it has been a blessing in that we have banded together to pull each other up and keep going despite the roadblocks. I have seen such strength from L as he pulled some of my load as well as his without complaint. I have seen such compassion and caring from my kids, for each other and for me. They have spent countless hours in waiting rooms with nary a meltdown. I have learned to cherish each day we have together and not to take anything for granted. The point I wish to make tonight is to tell your families and friends that you love them often, and show it daily. Never take it for granted when you are together, so many times we get into such a routine that we think that we'll make plenty of memories tomorrow, or when we are less busy, or when we have things just right. Take pictures of messy hair, messy faces as well as the immaculately groomed. I confess, I have looked at some of my favorite pictures and thought, "if only I'd combed her hair/swept the floor/changed her clothes, this would be a good picture." Now I feel like the memory of the messy strawberry face reminds me of how she shoved whole strawberries into her mouth and let the juice run down her face with the sheer delight that only a child has. I apologize for the long post, but I wanted to convey more than just "look at how cute our pictures turned out this year!" I do have things to complain about, but most important of all is that I am so grateful to still be here and able to give my children memories of me and make memories with them. I am vowing to be the fun mom, to tell my kids I love them even when they upset me, and to prioritize time with my family over everything else I feel like I "have" to do(I guess this means I am cleaning house even less these days, oh darn!) Because no matter what happens, these special times are going to end sooner or later. They will go to school, college, get married, etc. etc. But I am their Mommy, if just for today.

Just checking...

2008-10-09T11:42:00.004-07:00

Hello, beloved family and friends, I just wanted to put this out there for you who live in "the valley" as I have heard both the Mesa/Gilbert area and the Safford/Thatcher area referred to as(hilarious, by the way!) I just wanted to draw your attention to this blog post by my cousin M's wife A. It is pretty self explanatory, and I know people who are in both areas who I am hoping might know a place to rent/sell/buy for(slash from) them. They are such a sweet family and I wanted to see if maybe I could find someone who needs a place to live in Gilbert or has a place to sell in Safford(-ish, as A put it) Thanks for looking and have a great day!
Love, J